I ACTUALLY HATE...

... New Years Eve. The only thing that makes it bearable is having Helen and Bill here. Fortunately none of us are bothered about going out for the night and are just happy enjoying each others company. We've had a real hoot at the Michael McIntyre DVD that Charles got for Christmas to make up for him missing the gig back in November. Now we're just lounging around waiting for the clock to reach 12 and hoping we haven't all fallen asleep before then!!

SMOKING, DANNYMATT?

Who even thinks about smoking these days. I can't even tell you how long it's been but it must be around three months. (Yep - I've just been to check and it is in fact twelve weeks since I was a smoker!) I never, ever think about it. I don't miss it. I'm not compensating by over-eating. There's still an open packet in the kitchen cupboard somewhere, but it's not there to tempt or reassure me that I can always have one if I really need it because that is never going to happen; it's there so that I can look at it occasionally and know that I've won! My only wish is that I did it years ago. I've always known that conventional methods weren't going to work for me and it was just a case of finding the right person to do the hypnotherapy. Now I think I'll go back for a session to help me get over my bird-phobia!

HAVE NOTICED...

... that despite all my best intentions and contrary to all common sense, I am already sneakily trawling all the NUFC sites in the hope of some decent news about transfers. I do it every transfer window and ALWAYS end up disappointed and let down. Why torture myself? It's an addiction isn't it? Sad but true.

WAITING!!!

Impatiently!! For helen and Bill to arrive with the Indian takeaway! Still half an hour away from Morpeth. May have passed away from lack of food by the time they get here.

HELEN AND BILL...

... are coming up today and staying over new year. It will be good to sit down with them for proper chats, mostly I suspect about Hannah and Christina, but still good to share our worries. Have reluctantly had to start on baking for the coffee shops. Nothing too strenuous yet, just a few brownies for the freezer, but at least it's a beginning.

DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY...

... after that shambolic performance. Started brightly enough, but completely fell apart during the second half. Not enjoying this feeling at all. Also, not enjoying the thought that Christina may have decided to return home, calling time on her relationship with Tim. It's been building up for a few days, but she seems to have made the decision now and it looks like we're going to need to put her up again. There needs to be some serious talking before that happens though, because neither Charles nor I are up to coping with the stress that tends to accompany Christina. We are both feeling incredibly tense - a little bit like we did when she was discharged from hospital, only this time we know that the level of support is nothing like we were led to believe then. So - watch this space.

CRIKEY!!

We seem to be having a lazy day! Got up late, didn't actually get round to putting any make up on for ages, pottered about a bit and now appear to have run out of stuff to do. I'm not altogether comfortable with this though. I know for a fact that I will be looking for an excuse to do SOMETHING before too long. That could be any of the following: a trip to the tip, shopping for New Year (as we seem to be having a houseful again), sorting the fridges and freezers, starting on baking for the coffee shops... I really wish I could just sit around and relax, but it would appear that the relaxing gene was missed out in my case.

TOOK MUM...

... round her grandchildrens' homes today. We started with Christina at the farm, then moved into Gosfprth to visit James and Claire and ended up in Spittal terrace visiting Rachel and James. I think she really enjoyed seeing them and will be able to think about them all in their surroundings when she gets back home. It's been a lovely few days, but I have to say I'm quite looking for ward to an evening without entertaining or cooking, just sitting in front of the telly eating leftovers! So far as I'm aware there's very little planned for the next two days, although Charles seems quite eager to go to the sales(!), but we're expecting Helen and Bill to return for New Year and it sounds as though most of the kids would like to come round on New Year's Day at some point. Might have a little shut eye now...

HOW TOUGH...

... was that result this afternoon? Not that I had any hope of winning the game at the outset, but to take the lead three times and then to lose it in the dying minutes was so hard to take. Charles is watching it now, but I can't bear it. (Man U have just scored their 4th, so can only be minutes left. Oh there we go - the whistles gone. So cruel.)

I THOUGHT...

... that Boxing Day was supposed to be a really relaxed, chilled, have-a-lie-in sort of day. At least, it always was when I was a youngster. Today though is shaping up to be as hectic as yesterday. There's half a cow in the oven, ready for Christina and Tim to arrive. Then it's party food for the afternoon Birthday shindig. Hope everyone enjoys it!!!

HAPPY CHRISTMAS DANNYMATT!!

Hope it's a good one for you and yours! I don't know, all those weeks of preparation and it's all over in the blink of an eye. James and Claire were here at the crack of dawn, had breakfast and their pressies, then had lunch, collapsed in front of the telly and departed for Claire's Mum and Dad's mid-afternoon. It was lovely to see them and to know that they'll be back for the family party tomorrow, when we'll celebrate James's birthday properly. Christina and Tim are coming over in the morning, so we've still got all their presents waiting for them. It's the first time she hasn't spent the day with us, but we don't mind because, after a difficult couple of weeks, she now seems happy and settled. Mum'll be here tomorrow: the first time since the wedding and the disastrous few days afterwards!! Let's hope things go a little more smoothly this time.

LOVE THIS TIME!

Everything's ready. We don't need to go out for anything. It's warm and cosy inside and we've got Carols from Kings on. Christmas really has begun.

QUITE CHILLED NOW!!

In a smug sort of way. I know, there's nothing appealing about being smug, but I don't really care. I'm sorted and that makes me feel good. Just a few last minute jobs to do this afternoon and tomorrow and then we're ready. Actually, Charles is noticeable only by his absence today. He went off to take Christina into town early this morning and hasn't been seen since. Hmmm... It is absolutely blowing a gale outside. In fact the boiler is really struggling to fire up. Hope it settles down soon. Not sure what to do now...

JUST WAITING...

... for the Tesco delivery to arrive. Typically, I got up early so that I was half respectable for when he got here, but I know that having done that it will now arrive at the END of the two hour window. If I'd had a lie in you can be sure that it would have arrived bang on 8.00! Today's a bit of an odd one really. Firstly, there's no prep to do for Kevin or Applebys. Secondly, it's a little too soon to be doing much for the Big Day. Thirdly, it's interrupted by the match and all the build up that comes with that. So, there won't be much happening in the kitchen today, apart from a lot of huffing and puffing about where all the Tesco's stuff is going to go. (Must remember we've got a Marks and Spencers buffet order to pick up first thing on Christmas Eve. There's no way I'm doing the Boxing day family get together without MY M and S!) Let's just hope the lads give it there all today and come away with three points. If they don't, we're in serious trouble.

I'M OFFICIALLY...

... on my hols now!!! How good does that feel? Had a fairly hectic morning of deliveries. We DID manage to stack everything up in the car, ended up helping Kevin to transfer everything into his freezer, decided if we win the lottery we want to buy Kevin's house, made the huge mistake of going to Asda for a few bits and pieces and ended up in total gridlock trying to get to the checkout... ... then, once I'd made my escape and found Charles (who sensibly had waited in the car) we called in on James and Claire quickly, then rushed home ready to start on Christmas cooking - FOR US!! There's a hotpot in the oven, smelling wonderful and absolutely perfect for an evening like this. I've got the Tesco delivery coming tomorrow morning (Just as well as there's no way I'm setting foot inside a supermarket again before Christmas!) and I think I ordered some flowers from Next that should arrive tomorrow as well. Of course we've got the match to go to in the afternoon. I am so not looking forward to that! A must win game? Unfortunately it's exactly the sort of game we will throw away.

NOT SURE...

... how we're going to get everything in the car this morning! It'll certainly be a struggle. Mind you, once it's over, that's it! I'm on my hols!!!

THE TREE'S UP!!

Charles actually made the suggestion that he could save me time if he chose the tree himself! Well, he actually went to Heighley Gate with Christina on the way to her appointment in Alnwick so she almost certainly had some influence. In any event, he chose the tree without me being there!! Bearing in mind that last year we had absolutely the most perfect tree - so perfect it looked artificial if you know what I mean - it was remarkably brave of him! And the tree that he brought home? Was pretty damn near perfect again!! It's looking gorgeous now, and so is the rest of the house. I got up at the crack of sparrers - well actually before that to be honest - and started putting the mammoth order together for tomorrow. That took the best part of the morning and then it was onto cleaning and changing all the bedding. Christina and Tim called in after her counselling session. She was great. Not at all angry in the way that she had been at the end of the last two sessions. Once they'd left we got on with putting the tree up and at last I think we're beginning to feel a bit Christmassy!!

CHICKLING AT...

... dannymatt's posts about the Winter Vomiting Bug over on facebook - but I'm not going to let him know!

NEARLY THERE!!

One more delivery and then I'm off for ten days. YAY!!! Most of the baking is done and I'm looking forward to clearing the freezers out for a while. At least I should be able to find room for the Tesco delivery which is scheduled for Saturday. Had a lovely morning actually. On my way home from Jesmond I called in at James and Claire's and we had coffee together after they'd shown me round. The unpacking is going pretty well considering they're still quite short of chests of drawers and useful things like that. They are on holiday now until the new year so it'll be nice to be able to call in and see them occasionally. I suppose the tendency will be to stop off whenever we've been into town, which we really mustn't do as that might get to be a bit much. Just waiting for Charles to get home. The holiday also begins for him today and the first thing we're going to do in the morning is to go to Heighley Gate for our tree. Everyone else seems to have had theirs up for ages and I feel a bit left out now!!

SITTING AND WATCHING...

... Strictly again from Saturday night, with James. Charles has gone to bed!!! It's been another very busy day, although it started very pleasantly at SAKs having my colour done and a really nice cut. Since I got back I've baked non-stop, getting ready for tomorrows delivery and the mega- deliveries on Friday. Actually can't wait for Thursday evening, when everything's boxed up and ready to ship out!

HAVEN'T POSTED AT ALL TODAY!

Why not? GUESS!!!

URRGGH!

Been up all night. Just could not sleep. And then just about an hour after I finally dropped off Charles was up for the day, setting off at some Godless hour to go with James to take the van back. I think he had to be at James's by 6.45! What it meant was that I was also up, and cleaning the ovens in my PJs - not pleasant, neither the ovens nor me in my PJs at that time of day. Must say huge thank you to Charles though because he took the Radcliffes delivery as he was going that way ad saved me a 50 mile round trip. I just did the Applebys drop and a bit of shopping and have been making macarons for an order on Wednesday since I got back. Am feeling pretty tired today, so can't imagine how Charles feels after all the running around he did at the weekend. James and Claire must be pretty shattered too!!

OH GOD

I was going to write a post about the emotional viewing tonight. Starting with Lisa who was so upset at being voted off Strictly and then all the tears that came with SPOTY. And then the news came on. How the parents and families of those children in Connecticut will ever get over the events of Friday God alone knows. It is truly heartbreaking on an unimaginable scale. Puts everything else into perspective.

JUST BACK FROM...

... Gosforth, where I've done a little bit of cleaning at the flat while everyone else gets all the really hard work done. What a massive job it's turning out to be. There's still quite a bit to clear out of the flat before the morning and the stuff that's waiting to be sorted at the house is pretty daunting. At least James and Claire are on holiday now until the new year (apart from one day - Tuesday I think) so they have a bit f time to sort things out. Claire's dad is in there and has already knocked out some wardrobes and an area under the window in the bay upstairs. No flies on him then. I'm going to get my orders finished for tomorrow and then I might feel inclined to clean either the oven or some windows. (On the other hand I might just lie down until I feel better!)

SOUNDS LIKE...

... Molly Maid are going to have their work cut out at the new house today. Apparently it was left in a real mess and James has banned me from going round until the cleaners have finished!! I HAD thought that I was on cleaning duty at the flat today, but apparently that's not the case just yet. So I'm making gingerbread snowmen instead! We've both had a restless night. I didn't get to sleep until after 3.00 and Charles was up for the day at 4.00. Meanwhile, apparently James and Claire have slept like logs. Surely that can't be right???

THEY'VE GOT THE KEYS!!!

James and Claire have got their keys. Poor things have waited on tenterhooks all day, but finally I got a text a while ago to say they were on their way to pick the keys up, so everything must be complete now, thank goodness. Charles is setting off to pick up the van which I think we're having for the weekend. Very kindly, one of James's clients has let him have it. In fact, come to think of it, for someone in the logistics/freight forwarding business, this moving lark should be dead easy!!

CENTURION BAR?!?!

Have had two calls this week from the manager of this bar. He wants to meet to talk about me supplying cakes!! Apparently he's tried them in Radcliffes. I've put him off until the New Year!

NOT GOOD

As predicted, Christina has really struggled this morning. I think we need to give her time, but it really is stressful for everyone, especially Charles who has been taxiing her around. What a contrast. Christina in the depths and James and Claire getting themselves all geared up for the big move. We'll get through this... repeat... and again...

EMERGENCY DELIVERY...

... on the way to Radcliffes, thanks to Charles, who will be picking Christina up on the way back and taking her to Alnwick for her counselling session. She's struggled this week, really since her last session, so I hope she can find some comfort today. I suppose there's a lot going on for her to deal with just now. Christmas is days away and she is still not working so has no money to buy treats, James and Claire are moving into their own home tomorrow, Tim is making big changes on the farm - replacing sheep with bikes!!! It will seem to Christina that everyone else is moving on with their lives - and she's not. It's bound to be difficult for her and my heart goes out to her. I'm going into Morpeth in a while, dropping a fab chocolate birthday cake off on the way. And then it's back to the kitchen where I clearly belong. (At least it's nice and warm!!)

SO, THE GIRLS AND I...

... enjoyed a lovely lazy afternoon - well it was more like an hour really, but as it never, ever happens it was really lovely to just lie down, read and snooze with a little Westie snuggled up on either side. They're so soft after their haircut last week and still have the gorgeous baby powder smell, so it was really indulgent! Anyway, all of this relaxing faded into oblivion when Kevin sent a text asking if I had any cake! Of course I have cake, Kevin, it's what I do, I've always got cake. Why don't you say what you really mean??? So he did. In a kind of manic conversation, Kevin described his day and how he has been beating customers away with a big stick to stop them eating all the cake, but it clearly didn't work and he now needs an emergency order tomorrow, which I've spent all evening working on. Bless him.

WARM AND COSY...

... in the house. Just looking at Lily and Rose all snuggled up and fast asleep is making me feel very tired. Might just have to lie down with my Kindle for a while. BLISS!!!

LAST NIGHT...

... was indeed heartbreaking for a number of reasons, only one of which was the outcome of the football match.

YUMMY CHOCOLATE CAKE!!

GOOD MORNING SO FAR!

It's only 11.15 and I've managed to get the order for Applebys ready *just waiting for the coffee cake to cool before adding the frosting), the chocolate birthday cake ready (actually don't want this one to go, It smells divine!), a large quiche ready for Kevin and more chocolate sponges in the oven. Not too bad!

COULD BE A PRETTY...

... hectic week, one way and another. By Friday James and Claire are hoping to have the keys to their new home and it will be all hands on deck to help them get moved in over the weekend. I'm so excited for them - and anxious too - just want everything to go smoothly for them. Cake-wise it's busy too. A wedding and a couple of birthdays in addition to the usual coffee shop stuff. Also I really need to look at stock levels to make sure the shops are going to be okay during my hols!! Tonight is Cheering Hannah Up Night. I've cooked up a big bowl of chilli and we've got enchiladas and fajitas, so plenty of nibbly things as I know she's not really eating properly at the moment. Had a productive day so far today. Made a coconut cake with fresh coconut. Haven't done one of these before and probably won't be doing it again, having spent the best part of 15 minutes trying to smash the wretched thing to bits with a hammer. Can't be bothered with all that. Because it only needed egg yolks I've got a couple of dozen meringues drying out in the oven now, but they'll be useful over Christmas. Made four tiny square Christmas cakes - as you do - they can either go into the shop, or be gifts, I haven't decided yet. Okay, nearly 5.00. Time for a cuppa I think...

HANNAH'S COMING ROUND...

... after work tomorrow. She's really struggling. James and Claire are also coming so between us we should be able to keep her from thinking too much. She'll end up watching the footie - and that'll be enough to take anyone's mind off their troubles! (Only joking. I'm actually so sad for Hannah and extremely worried about her.)

SPATIAL AWARENESS...

... has never been one of my stronger features, it has to be said. So the fact that I have spent the afternoon making a HUGE chocolate birthday cake (No James - not for you) for later this week, with the intention of freezing it first, has of course backfired badly, due to the fact that there is actually no available space whatsoever in any of the freezers. Hmmm. What to do???

YUP!!

He's been in the house for 10 minutes and Lily has gone from being a whirling dervish to a contented and snuggly little poppet who is now firmly attached to her dad's side on the sofa. Thanks Lily. Makes me feel great! (Rose is totally bemused by all the goings on today. She clearly wants no part of the silliness and keeps looking at me as if to say, "I'm not being silly, am I Mum?!")

ALL BY MYSELF...

.. today! Well apart from the girls, one of whom has been exceedingly naughty and very needy as if she knows her dad has left her. (He's only gone to Preston to see his Mum!) He WAS going to stay overnight, but has thankfully changed his mind and is on his way back now. This is a very good thing as it might calm Lily down a bit. Clearly she's missing the snuggles on the settee!! Ah, here he is now. Let's see if she calms down.

BUSY, BUSY BUSY DAY!!!

Can't wait for Dec 21st when my holiday starts. And before anyone DARES to remark that I am in fact retired, I just need to point out that I only retired from teaching and am in fact putting in pretty much the same hours now that I bake for a living. Don't make as much money, but still work as hard. The day began at 6am when I had to go to the freezer in the shed to lift out 56 scones. Charles took the Radcliffes delivery because there was a private order of mince pies that took up two huge bread crates, and I did Applebys. Did a bit of shopping while I was in Morpeth, came home and finished the wedding cake that had been such a trial yesterday. It just needs final assembly at the venue. Then it was batch baking mince pies, scones and carrot cakes. Have just finished and can't actually be bothered to cook anything for tea, so we're making do with bacon butties!!

SO TODAY WAS A DAY...

... when I somehow forgot how to bake and was completely unable to apply a sheet of sugarpaste to the wedding cake I was supposed to be completing today. NOTHING I tried to do worked out today, so tempers have been more than a little frayed in the kitchen. Mind you Kevin didn't help either, sending the order through this afternoon and then adding more and more to it just when I thought I'd got it complete. Christina had a session with her therapist this morning and clearly had a lot to get to grips with because she was clearly upset and angry when she came home. She DID calm down though and that is something that just wouldn't have happened last year. She's fine now. Can't get moved for mincepies today. I'm taking 84 to Jesmond tomorrow, along with everything else for Radcliffes and Applebys. It's actually surprising how much room that number of mincepies takes up!!

RANT AHEAD...

... okay, so we've had an inch of snow. That's all really. Admittedly it fell on icy roads. That would be why it took me an hour and a half to get from Heighley Gate to Fram this morning/afternoon. In all the years we've lived here I've never seen chaos like it. Traffic at a complete standstill. apart from ME in my Peugeot who tried desperately to slow down from the 10 mph I was doing when the guy in front put his brakes on, only to discover that I was on a slide and wasn't going to be stopping any time soon. To avoid hitting the trailer on the vehicle in front (who had stopped) I had to steer out into the oncoming lane and just prayed that there was enough space to get through - and that I would in fact be able to steer at all. Fortunately for me, the oncoming traffic was at a standstill and there was sufficient space to get through, but I don't think I've ever felt so afraid or helpless. The gritters DID eventually turn up as did the police, who made no attempt whatsoever to explain what the situation was further up the road. So an inch of snow and everything grinds to a halt?! Brilliant!

BUSY FEW DAYS...

... coming up. There's a pretty mega order for a customer at Radcliffes on Friday. A wedding cake and two birthday cakes for next Wednesday and the usual deliveries to Jesmond and Applebys. Won't be much time for putting my feet up then. The girls have got their pre-Christmas beauty session at Woofcuts tomorrow. Unfortunately they hate it!! I'm not having them cut short, just a good tidy up. And they'll come home smelling of baby powder - a fragrance that lasts for days. Lovely!! Hannah's coming round this evening. I think she needs to fill her time with family and friends at the moment. She was at James and Claire's last night so I hope it's all helping her a little bit to get to grips with what's happened. I need to get some shopping in this morning and think it might have to be done in Morpeth. Not looking forward to this as parking is horrendous in the build up to Christmas. Okay, I'd better go and get the car defrosted. Ugh!

DULL, GREY AND WET...

... but, so long as it doesn't freeze tonight, it may mean the end of the absolutely lethal pavements/skating rinks around Cheviot Lodge. I ventured out yesterday afternoon, only really across the road to a friend's "Jamie at Home" party, and I really wished I'd taken a stick/zimmer/crampons with me, it was that bad. How sad is that though? 'Jamie at Home' in the middle of the day. Actually, its as well I went because there was only one other person there and she clearly wasn't going to spend much although once I'd told her that I'd only gone to get the trifle bowl and it was in the sale, she perked up and decided to order one for herself. Fortunately, another friend arrived with two of her daughters, so by the time I left there was a bot more going on, but I can't imagine that Liz will make much of a living through Jamie's stuff. Talking of yesterday - How wrong was I about the match? Just goes to show!!

YAY...

... RESULT!! OH ME OF LITTLE FAITH!!!!

DON'T MAKE ME GO...

... to the match tonight Charles. I really can't stand the pressure. Just seen on SSN that Demba Ba has turned down the latest contract offer. Great - he'll be really focused on the game tonight won't he? So, we've lost our last four games. Not exactly feeling confident about tonight either. Plus - it's FREEZING.

NOT AS BUSY A DAY...

... as yesterday, very pleasant though. Went into Morpeth this morning and did some bits of Christmassy shopping with Charles, then came home and were joined by James and Claire for a while this afternoon. I'd like to thank James for clearing a load of stuff out of our loft and thus freeing up a fair bit of space which I can now fill with MY STUFF, thank you very much!!! A fortnight from now those two should, fingers crossed, be moving into their new house. They might not have much to put in it yet, but it will be theirs and there is nothing to beat that feeling. Had a call from Alice at Applebys this afternoon wanting a delivery tomorrow. couldn't really pin her down to want she wants, so I'm taking a selection of stuff and we'll just take it from there. Okay, we've watched Strictly and Xfactor results, there's nothing else worth staying up for (Charles has got some cheesy Christmas film on) so I'm going to turn in early tonight!

GOT IT!!

The Tesco slot, on Saturday 22nd December between 8.00 and 10.00! Perfect!! Had a little panic when the site froze for a while last night, but I'd already had confirmation that I'd got the time I wanted so I wasn't all that worried, but knew that I had to get my shopping basket through the checkout within two hours. Fortunately it was just a minor blip and all was sorted within minutes. Equally fortunately, I didn't have to do the entire shop last night, although I had pretty much done most of it in advance, so it literally took seconds to place. Looking at it this morning, every single slot for that day has gone, so it WAS worth sitting up last night. No battling the frenzied crowds of supermarket shoppers for me thank you very much!

(WHILE I'M WAITING...)

... I'm really disappointed to say that I let the girls have an early Christmas present today (as I hadn't got them an Advent Calendar like I did last year). I'd got them cosy little cube shaped beds that I thought they would love, especially Lily who loves being in enclosed little spaces, but they seem totally uninterested in them and have actually gone to sleep OUTSIDE the beds. Maybe they just need to get used to them. I only let them have them really because I've got some other beds for them to have actually at Christmas. I really hope they like the other ones because they are something really special!! Right, I'm off to Tesco...

WAITING UP TILL MIDNIGHT...

... purely so I can book a Tesco slot for Christmas week. Is it worth it? Yes, absolutely if you don't want to spend the best part of a full day, pushing a trolley round any supermarket just before Christmas. I vividly recall being in Tescos years ago and getting caught up in TROLLEY GRIDLOCK. I was unfortunately in the fresh meat section, where I stayed for hours without making any headway whatsoever, because nobody could move anywhere. I was frozen by the time we eventually got moving and vowed that I would never, ever subject myself to such insane shopping hell. It really must be years since I actually set foot in a supermarket during regular hours at Christmas, because while I was at Heddon, I would leave home at about 4am and do the Christmas food shop on the way to work. Just me and the alcoholics at that time!! Anyway I'm aiming for the Saturday delivery and slots will come on line at midnight tonight. 20 minutes to get my finger poised. Yes, I've been here before, I know what I'm doing!!!

WHAT AN INCREDIBLY...

... BUSY AND PRODUCTIVE DAY I'VE HAD TODAY!! I've made a stable birthday cake, covered a 12" square by 4" deep fruitcake, the bottom tier of a wedding cake that goes out next week, baked coffee shop stuff in readiness for Monday and started to wrap presents! Feet are killing me as I haven't sat down at all since I got up this morning, but I'm feeling such a sense of achievement I really don't care. (It may not seem much to anyone else, but I know how much I've still got to get through before I have my little Christmas break!!) An evening of mind-numbing telly awaits. Yippeeee!!

FEELING A BIT...

... down today. No idea why. Nothings happened to warrant feeling like this. It's been a normal Friday. Deliveries to Applebys and Radcliffes, shopping, baking, spending a bit of time with Christina... ... so I'm not altogether sure about my mood. Just have that sense of impending doom. Hate feeling like this.

OKAY , SO CHRISTINA AND JAMES...

... are all grown up now (James is a married man for goodness sake!) - and they probably done even believe in Santa any more, but none of that seemed to matter this afternoon when I was searching every nook and cranny for the Missing Santa Sacks. The sense of panic was overwhelming - even Charles got up and had a bit of a look. I was up and down the loft ladders, rummaged through every black bin liner and had just about given up when I noticed one bag, right next to the hatch that I must have passed about a dozen times... ... and there they were! Clearly I'd strategically placed them there so they'd be easy to find!! That plan didn't work then.

CRIKEY!!

How out of touch am I? I didn't even realise we were playing tonight! But according to twitter we're 1 - 0 up at Stoke thanks to Cisse. Not going to look again in case I jinx it.

RAYBANS...

... on this morning!! What a change. Cold, but very bright. Not going to explain what I've been doing today - just look back over the weeks and you'll find the Wednesday itinerary. Am feeling a bit sleepy now, having just looked across at the girls who are both spark out in the sunroom. Lily's draped over a cushion and Rose is snuggled into a throw. I've a good mind to get my Kindle and settle down with them for a little while!! (Or maybe I should wait until I've got the two banana loaves and the quiche out of the oven. Rats!)

FOLLOWING ON FROM...

... Not Much to Report on Monday - comes Even Less to Mention on Tuesday. Haven't been out of the house today. Weather's been vile anyway. But I HAVE finished the Alvis car cake and made all the bits for two birthday cakes that are coming up next week. I've wrapped and tied all the Christmas cakes, seven of which are going tomorrow, so I should get the dining table back! Haven't heard anything from Applebys since last Friday. Maybe they hated it! Mind you, considering we had an emergency request for more supplies the same day it seems a bit odd that there's been no communication since. There's no way I'm going to chase them though. If they're not keen it's absolutely no problem for me!!

NOT MUCH TO REPORT TODAY

Pretty typical Monday - delivery, shopping, replacing stock, making a model Alvis motor car. Totally depressing weather. I don't think it's stopped raining all day and we've certainly never seen daylight as such. The girls have been little monsters as well. They want to be out, then I open the door and they realise it's wet and windy so they don't want to be out, then they need a wee, so they do want to be out, then they see something skittering around in the gloom outside and they need to be out to investigate it further, only to discover it's a boring old leaf... Get the idea???

NOT AN EASY DAY

Hannah has tried really hard, but there have been times when she's seemed completely overwhelmed. We've tried to keep her busy. Went into Morpeth this morning and had coffee at Curiously Wicked (won't bother again), then did some girly shopping while Bill and Charles trailed in our wake. Then we went over to Kirkley to see Christina and Tim. That was really nice. Tim's Mum came to join us and we had (more) coffee and cakes, then Tim took everyone round the farm to check out the progress that's being made towards setting up the cycle business and coffee shop. He's doing really. I'm impressed. We came back to Fram, checked the dogs and then had a very late Sunday lunch at the Village Inn. Unfortunately we times it to coincide with the football and endured a painful first half, but left during half time and really didn't want to know anything more about it. Helen, Bill and Hannah left soon after and are now in Gosforth. Hannah knows she can come here anytime she needs a bolthole, but I'm glad she's got her Mum and Dad with her for another day (possibly longer). Now trying to watch telly, but the phone keeps ringing and we're not getting much peace!

VERY TIRED TODAY!

Not the best night. Helen, Bill and Hannah stayed and we went to bed late and then got up very early with little sleep in between. We're all just sitting round in companiable, but sleepy, tiredness now, watching MotD and some of us are dreading the match this afternoon as there's NO CHANCE that we're going to win it with the number of injuries we're carrying. The girls have just got back from a long walk with Uncle Bill and Tex. They look like little drowned rats and are not too happy about this!! Not sure what we'll be doing today. H and B aren't at school tomorrow so will be staying up here. Whether that's with us or Rachel I don't know yet. There's a lot to sort out with Hannah and it's going to take some time. We all need to be there for her right now.

LOTS OF TEARS TODAY

Helen and Bill have brought Hannah round to ours for the day. She's still raw about the break up and very tearful. We've had lots of talks and cuddles, a real case of the family gathering round to support and care. We have just got back from the Anglers Arms where we were joined by Christina and Tim for either a very late lunch or an extremely early dinner. For a short time Hannah was able to relax a little and join in with the banter, but tears have been pretty close to the surface all the time. We all know how it feels and nothing anyone says is going to make her feel better. My heart absolutely goes out for her.

STRESS LEVELS REACH...

... an all time high!! At least they did this morning as we tried to juggle two deliveries but we managed to get both to their destinations on time and in good order. We picked up Christina, went shopping and got home before midday. I sent the afternoon making scones, quiche and apple pies. Then, about an hour ago, Alice from Applebys rang up in a panic because everything ad sold and she had nothing to sell tomorrow. Well Alice, I DID tell you to stock the freezer and then this wouldn't be a problem. So, just while they find their feet, I've sent an emergency delivery down this afternoon. Charles was going through Morpeth to take Christina home, so it's not a problem, but I'll be making it clear that this is not to happen once they're established. I'm still reeling from the news last night about Hannah. In fact I had a terrible night's sleep and kept waking up thinking about her. However, I'm sure my bad night was nothing compared to hers. Helen and Bill will be arriving here later on, having stopped in Gosforth to see Han. After that I suppose the weekend will be dictated by Hannah's needs - and so it should be. Whatever else happens though, I've got to bake bakewells and scones again before Monday.

HELEN RANG...

... a few minutes ago. Jake has just been a total turd and finished with Hannah, who understandably is in bits. Obviously Helen and Bill will come up here for the weekend as she's going to need a lot of support. I'm gutted for Han. There's so much going on in her life at the moment and she really did not need this. I really feel for Helen as well. Obviously she feels totally helpless and can't understand why it's happened out of the blue. Jake - what have you done?

PAUSE FOR BREATH!!

Haven't stopped all day. Feet are so sore, back's killing me. Just got a quiche to make then I can concentrate on getting something for US to eat!!

AND TOTALLY PREDICTABLY...

... the weekend Charles and I decide to go to Yorkshire for a couple of days, Applebys decide it's time to open their coffee shop. I would have put money on it actually. So, we are still going to go, but I'm having a crazy bake-fest now and probably again tomorrow and on Sunday when we get home. I'm kind of wondering if it really is worth going away for one night.

GOING TO ...

... Fenwicks 20% off night tomorrow. That means meeting up with James and Claire and possibly Rachel and Hannah also. Looking forward to it, so long as it's not too busy. Hopefully by the end of the evening I will have done ALL of my Christmas shopping. (Smug smile!)

DIDN'T HAVE MY HAIR COLOURED...

... but DID have a trim and managed to get an appointment for Christmas Eve - YAY! Did a mega food shop, including lots of store cupboard stuff for Christmas, so had to spend about an hour finding places to stash it when I got home because the cupboards aren't exactly bare. Finished all the Christmas cakes this afternoon - YAY and YAY again!! Just waiting for a couple who are getting married on December 12th, and who's cake I'm making to turn up with the topper they want me to use on it. Got a little gammon joint in the oven and it smells fabulous. Am now convinced I'm starving!!

NUSHKI'S FOLLY...

... Will explain when I've got a little more time!! Just rushing off to Morpeth now, I'm supposed to be having my roots done, but I've just had a good look and actually they don't seem to need doing yet, so there may be a change of plan when I get to SAKs. (Maybe stopping smoking slows down the grey!!) Need to do some food shopping and then want to try and get three more Christmas cakes finished this afternoon. Right - I'm off.

THINK I NEED TO...

... sit down before I fall down. Feel a bit light headed actually. Could be just that I haven't eaten much during the day I suppose, but feel quite weird. Charles has just got home, Christina may pop round later when Tim goes up to Thrunton for a bike ride. Can't quite get my head round that to be honest - I know he's a cycling nut, but it'll be darker than dark out thee at Thrunton and I would have thought that bike lights would be pretty ineffective in that sort of terrain. Plus, we all know about Nushki's Folly don't we?

WENT TO THE BUTTERFLY CABINET...

... for breakfast this morning - us, Jim and Claire, Helen and Bill, Rachel and James and Hannah. Great to see everyone. Ate far too much. wasn't altogether impressed by the service - half of us having finished our brekkie before the others had got theirs wasn't good. But, arrangements made for meeting up mid-week to go late night 20% off shopping at Fenwicks and then for Charles and I (and the girls) to go and stay with Helen and Bill next weekend. Got home, via Waitrose and Bookers (one extreme to the other!!) only to discover that our fridge in the kitchen had exploded and spewed it's contents all over the floor. Unfortunately most of the stuff in that fridge was in glass jars and bottles, so you can imagine the level of debris we had to clear up. Glass mixed with olives, sauces, dips, jams and marmalade - oh yes it was brilliant. The poor girls must have been petrified. Charles reckons a big piece of ice dislodged and brought the shelf crashing down, so clearly it's my fault for not noticing that it needed defrosting!! However, we now have a spotlessly clean floor and the fridge has had it's pre-Christmas clear out already, so all is not doom and gloom.

DIDN'T ENJOY THAT...

... ONE LITTLE BIT. In fact the best thing about this afternoon was the decision to get a taxi into town from James's place. Why haven't we done this before. Probably costs less than getting the metro and we just whizz up the taxi/bus lane, don't have to worry about finding a parking space, don't pay huge parking fees - its great - no hassle at all. Oh the other good thing was the sort of tapas-type lunch we shared (we being Charles, James, Matthew and me) at El Loco (I THINK that's what it's called) - BUT unfortunately we won't be able to do THAT again as we LOST THE BLOODY MATCH, so as omens go it's a non-starter in future. The match itself? Least said the better, but crap would do for starters.

WONDER WHAT IT'S LIKE...

... to be Ross Noble's four year old daughter?

HAD MY MAKE UP DONE...

... at Clinique in Fenwicks. Went with Christina and had a lovely girly time. Came out feeling fab: glamorous and pampered with perfect make up ready for going out tonight to the Ross Noble gig. THEN got all upset (don't ask) and managed to cry it all off. Couldn't help myself. Kept trying to stop the flow by holding a tissue under my eyes, but it didn't work. What a waste!

HELLO BLOG!

ARE YOU MISSING ME? JUST WONDERING...

YEAH - I KNOW THAT DANNYMATT...

... but my problem with the blog is actually finding time these days. This sounds pretty pathetic I know, but it's almost become something I feel I ought to do, rather than something I am inspired to do, which is a bit of a shame really. I had only thought this morning, that I would have a break from it, stop feeling I need to blog each day and only do so when I have something of significance to impart. I think this is the way forward and I'm not going to beat myself up if I don't feel the need to write a post. Could be a while then!!!

NOT A BAD MORNING...

... quite bright and mild so far. Pity we've had yet another oil delivery. Charles won't be happy, but we've got the heating turned down and timed so I don't know how we can avoid it really. It just appears that we are having far more frequent deliveries these days. Not good. Right, I'm off to Jesmond shortly, calling in at Asda and the cake decorating shop on the way back. Then it's anther day in the kitchen... I can sense you going "Zzzzzzzzz" !!

7 CHRISTMAS CAKES...

... marzipanned, covered with sugarpaste and decorated. Not bad for a morning's work. (All the decorations had been made last week though!) I think I've got another seven to do, but they can wait for a while. Glad to have a sit down for a few minutes, although I've just sent Kevin a reminder about tomorrow's order, so it won't last long!!

HIGHLY ENJOYABLE...

... evening! Pub meal in Gosforth, followed by the hilarious Michael McIntyre. Really enjoyed it!

CHARLES'S MUM...

... gave us all a bit of a scare this morning. She'd had a nasty turn, and there was some fear that she might have had a heart attack, but it transpired later in the day that it was a muscle spasm. However, it was enough for Charles to be thinking of heading over to Preston. That's all changed now and she's back at home - thank goodness. I tried to help things by suggesting someone else had our tickets for the Michael McIntyre concert tonight, but probably only succeeded in complicating things and annoying James - again! Any way - as we were! Claire is taking Christina and I into Gosforth, where we're meeting James and going for dinner, then onto the Arena. At some point Charles (and maybe Tim) will pick us up. (This is all because I cannot drive in the dark. It's such a pain!)

I THINK I'M GOING...

... to see Michael McIntyre tonight at the Arena. I only say "I THINK" because originally Charles and I were going, and then Charles discovered he has a governor's meeting and offered the ticket to Christina, then Christina didn't come back last night and I'm not convinced she'll get here today either, so I haven't really got a clue what's going on, whether anyone will actually be going with me or whether I should just offer the tickets to someone else. Feel very down at the moment. Probably just tired and ready for a break.

CAN'T HONESTLY REMEMBER...

... the last time we had such a horrible day. The only decent thing about it was getting home from the match to be greeted with pure rapture by the girls. The rest of it has been absolutely lousy.

EVEN MORE ANNOYINGLY...

... as soon as I'd blogged the last post, I went to check my phone and there was the order from Kevin. He'd only just sent it mond, so technically I should still have told him he was too late. Did I? Of course not. #Ineedtotoughenup

ANNOYINGLY...

... I'm still waiting to hear from Kevin about tomorrow's order. It should have been placed yesterday. He had a reminder text from me two hours ago. Still no word. I really think that , as we're out at the match this afternoon, and as a matter of principle, I should stand up for myself and tell him he's actually too late this time. Will I do it???

NOT USUALLY A GREAT FAN...

... of james Bond films... ... but having just got back from watching 'Skyfall' all I can say is... ...WOW, What a brilliant film! I loved it!!

WHAT A TREAT IT WAS...

... just going shopping with my daughter this morning. We went for a relaxed coffee and then mooched around the shops for a couple of hours, ending up in Fenwicks cosmetics department, signing ourselves up to have our make up done next week. I've had a pretty manic afternoon in the kitchen as Kevin appeared to think he would need an emergency order tomorrow when we saw him this morning, but I've heard nothing more about it so have somehow managed to find freezer space for everything, and can at least relax a bit, knowing that I can't make any more because I haven't got any more room!! Time to collapse in front of the telly now... which reminds me, we've been recording the 'Hebburn' series, having watched, and enjoyed, the first programme. Last night the three of us watched three episodes on the trot and had a really good laugh. It is so lovely to be able to feel relaxed and happy with Christina!

VERY TRUE DANNYMATT!

And what a weight has lifted from her shoulders. Sad that it didn't work out, but so glad that she is strong enough to make the right decision and to walk away. Looking forward to the morning s jaunt into town. Mind you everyone (Girls included) are still in the Land of Nod, so we won't be going anywhere just yet. I, on the other hand, had to get up early to get a lasagne into the oven, ready for the Radcliffe's delivery. Maybe tomorrow I'll get a lie-in!!

LOOKS LIKE...

... Christina might be living with us again. It seems that all is not happy on the Tim front, so she's her for a break, but seems to think it may well be a permanent break. She seems exhausted and has slept most of the afternoon, although I can hear her chuckling away at something right now. We're going to take her into town tomorrow morning so we can spoil her a bit. I think she deserves it. Talking of the morning, obviously it's Friday so it's Delivery Day. Kevin's order for the morning is huge! The biggest order to date!! Got some new stuff to try as well: Red velvet cake, lemon mini-victoria sponges and two jars of biscotti: gingerbread (yum yum) and pistachio and cranberry (equally yummy). Actually, it won't be long before we start selling mince pies. Fortunately, I've now got about 75 lined up in the freezer!!

OH WOW!!!

My kitchen is filled with the fragrance of gingerbread biscotti. It's like just Christmas Eve!! Might have found a new favourite thing to make!

DON'T THINK I'VE...

... blogged at all today. The fact that I'm actually not sure about this is somewhat worrying mind you!! Mind you it's perfectly justifiable if I haven't been on the blog, because to be honest this must be the first time I've sat down today. I've tried to make double batches of everything in the hope that, once Appleby's finally opens it's coffee shop doors, I'll be up and running and won't have a panic about getting stuff done on time. That's the theory anyway. Biggest problem now is running out of freezer space - again!! Won't mention that bit to Charles. Right, I'm going to have a go at biscotti now...

NOT SURE WHAT TO SAY...

... about the meeting at Appleby's this morning. Probably least said the better really.

UP EARLY...

... working on Santas, elves, Rudolphs etc, before going to Morpeth for a meeting at Appleby's. Very impressed with Charles who seems to be sticking to his diet pretty well so far. We should be getting the Slimmer's World cookbook through the post any day now. Might even see if he wants to get involved in the preparation of meals - that would be good!! Okay - I'll get back on here later when I've got through my list of jobs...

LOOKS LIKE...

... Appleby's bookshop coffee shop will be opening sooner rather than later. I've been asked to go to a meeting tomorrow to discuss the menu. Hope this isn't all going to be too much!

COLD AND FROSTY THIS MORNING

Got the engine ticking over on the Peugeot to take the chill off it before I set off for Jesmond. Need to do a few bits of shopping before heading back to start work on sugarpaste Santas, Rudolphs, elves and sacks of toys. Still seems too soon to be doing this, but then again, every other advert on the telly was for Christmas last night, so clearly I'd better get my skates on. Talking of telly - No more Downton until Christmas day. Boo Hoo!! (7 weeks tomorrow!)

CAN'T BEAR...

... to watch! We've only been playing for 20 minutes and Charles actually sounds like he's having a coronary. Think I'll stay in the kitchen!!

GOOD NIGHT LAST NIGHT

Really enjoyed Akbars. We were booked in pretty early, but the place was absolutely heaving, even at 6.30. Despite that we had absolutely brilliant service, nothing was too much trouble, we didn't have to wait, the food was yummy and there was loads of it - all in all a very enjoyable meal. We all agreed that it was probably not a place you'd choose for a quiet dinner with your partner, but for a group it was perfect. We've had a lovely couple of days really. Sadly Helen and Bill return to Yorkshire today and everything goes back to normal tomorrow. Roll on the next holidays!!!

JUST WANT TO SAY...

... I'm STARVING. That's all.

AKBAR'S TONIGHT

Actually can't wait!! I'm starving already. Last chance to meet up with Helen etc before they head home. I think we're all going round to James and Claire's place after the meal to look at the wedding album. (Obviously we've already seen it, but nobody else has.) Looking forward to a good evening!

STICKY TOFFEE PUDDING!!

Just made a couple to go in the freezer. They look fab and I was rather tempted to keep one out for us to try... ... and then I remembered the diet!

6.30PM...

... text from Kevin wanting emergency supplies for tomorrow. Told him he'll have to come and collect because we certainly weren't planning another trip to Gosforth in the morning, especially as we're all going out in town in the evening. Thought I'd got away with an easy weekend, but looks like it's another day of baking tomorrow.

HAVE JUST REALISED...

... that today I have not baked anything at all!! I honestly cannot remember the last time this happened.

BACK FROM...

... a day's shopping with my sister. What an enjoyable time we've had! Refreshment breaks x 3!! Very unhealthy but highly enjoyable. Lots of lovely purchases - I have to say I bought more things for other people than Helen did so I'm feeling less guilty about the stuff I did buy for myself. Thank you to Charles who has spent his day running me, Helen and Christina around, without complaining - much!!

ADRIANO'S WAS FAB...

... brilliant food, lovely red wine (even though I DID ask for French!!) and the BEST company... .. but now feel stuffed and uncomfortable and just want to go to sleep. #nopleasingsomepeople

NOT A GOOD AFTERNOON

Christina here - and stressed. Consequently so are we. Doesn't feel good. Bit anxious.

FAMILY MEAL TONIGHT!

Hmmm. How many texts does it take to arrange a family get together??? Clearly dozens - and that's just for tonight. We're trying to arrange something for all 12 of us on Saturday evening - and it's proving a little tricky! Anyway - tonight most of us are going to Adriano's in Gosforth - for Happy Hour! I'm a little concerned about Charles and his diet, but he assures me he'll go for the healthy options. No pud then!!

BIT OF A STRANGE DAY TODAY!

No real reason for saying that, apart from not having as much as usual to do. Charles brought Christina back with him when he returned from doing the coffee shop run. She seemed a bit tense today. Nothing like she's been in the past and she didn't lose her temper or anything, but it was just enough to raise the tension level in the house a bit. I don't feel as though we've done anything of any significance today. That in itself shouldn't be a problem. It's surely okay to have days when there's not much on? Just feels odd that's all. A bit of a waste!

LOOKS LIKE...

... Helen and Bill are going to be around for the next few days. This is good, as it will give us all a chance to catch up, but not so good because it will almost certainly involve eating. As Charles started his diet this week (and I joined in to give a bit of moral support) I don't want anything to disrupt his progress, so will need to be careful about what we all decide to do. I'm having a rather more relaxed day than I did yesterday. All those Christmas cakes took a bit of doing. Actually, I've just had an order for another fruit cake for a birthday at the end of December, so I might need to go and make another one!!

KITCHEN SMELLS OF...

... Christmas!! Lovely! Made four large and three small cakes this afternoon, ably assisted by Charles who did the actual mixing. Thank you Charles! Just waiting for Kevin to get hos act together and tell me what he needs tomorrow. I suspect it won't be a big order as it tends to go quiet in the cffee shop during school holidays. But we shall see... ... in a while.

5.30...

... and it's pitch-black out there. I find it quite depressing actually. Could be worse though - we could be in new York waiting for that storm to hit. I know it may be a bit of a panic about nothing, but with the level of flooding that's being predicted I keep thinking about all those people who live in the subways and in the underground network. Won't be much fun for them, but then they don't officially exist do they...?

STILL HERE!!

Just had a busy day so far. Went through to Gosforth this morning. Charles dropped me off to do the shopping and he went on to do the delivery, then it was back home to the kitchen for me. Really must try to take a bit of time off this week, otherwise Charles will be having a very disappointing half term holiday!

NEARLY TIME...

... for Downton Abbey!! Excited. Love it! Can't wait!!

VERY, VERY STRESSFUL...

... afternoon at SJP. Did we deserve to win? I really don't think so. There were times when we looked absolutely hapless. The trouble is this is becoming something of a default setting this season I'm afraid.

DON'T THINK THE GIRLS...

... have got their heads round the concept that the extra hour means an extra hour IN BED not an extra hour to be up and about!! Mind you, as we WERE up early, I've got all the jobs done and am now pretty much ready for the match - which kicks off at 3.00 (it's 9.30 now!!)

IT'S BEEN A ...

... really nice day today - relaxed and unhurried - bur spent in the company of our kids and their partners. The morning passed quickly as we got up late(ish) and all I needed to do was to make some cupcakes ready for Hallowe'en. Then we went to Gosforth and picked up James and Claire and headed over to the farm to have coffee and rather a lot of doughnuts with Christina and Tim. It was the first time James and Claire had seen the farm, but now they can imagine where Christina is spending most of her time these days. Then we went to Waitrose in Ponteland before heading home for an easy tea (Pizza!) and Strictly. Lovely!!

IT'S TWO WEEKS TODAY...

... since I was a smoker!! Doing really well. No cravings at all. Feeling healthier already. Brighter and more full of energy. All good then!!!

SICKENINGLY...

... I actually made a start on the dreaded Christmas shopping today. Not that I actually went out, just did stuff on-line, so it doesn't feel like real shopping. I'm quite pleased with myself though!! My excuse for starting so early is that the cake diary is pretty full as we get nearer to Christmas and I can't face having a last minute panic when I start to realise I'm running out of time. On another subject, why is there such a total load of rubbish on telly on a Friday night? Hopefully Graham Norton will rescue things with his Bond lineup, but apart from that everything else has been total crap.

FIRST SNOW...

... has arrived. It's been bitterly cold this afternoon and now we're having quite a heavy snow shower. Combine that with the clocks going back tomorrow and it all spells the start of winter to me. (Mind you, at least the clock in my car will be telling the right time. It's been an hour slow all summer!)

I JUST KNEW...

... EVEN WITHOUT OPENING IT, THAT THE COMMENT FROM DANNYMATT ON THE 'BIG GUNS" THREAD WOULD BE ABOUT BADGERS! And I wasn't disappointed!!

BIG GUNS...

... at Otterburn sound like they're coming through the walls!! Must be a big exercise - Wouldn't like to be living in Otterburn village right now, at least not without ear-defenders!

CHARLES HAS...

... gone to pick Christina up. She's got a full day off appointments up this way and needs transport to get to them. They should be arriving back here shortly after their first stop in Rothbury, then it's a lunchtime appointment in Alnwick followed by a session at the hairdressers in Morpeth this afternoon. James and Claire are coming round this evening. Hopefully Christina will still be here so we can have them all together. I've been up and baking for ages and now seem to have got to the point where I can chill a bit - which I intend to do quite literally as I'm going to make ice cream!!!

START OF HALF TERM...

... for Charles today. Bet he's glad about that!! I've started to drip-feed to Radcliffes the idea that I too might have a holiday. We've been open for almost a year and I haven't had a day off yet, so I think it's about time I did. God only knows what they'll do. Perhaps they'll bite the bullet and actually invest in the freezer I've been banging on about for the past 12 months. Or maybe they''ll have a fit of pique and source their baked goods fr someone else. Who knows??

FRIZZY HAIR WEATHER!!

Doesn't matter how much I straighten it, I can guarantee that within seconds of going outside this morning, it'll just be a frizzy mess. Grrrrr!! Charles doesn't have this problem so it's not even worth mentioning to him. Okay - guess the plan for today then? Yup, you got it, it's SO predictable isn't it! Must just mention that last night, for the first time in ages, the girls slept through and I actually woke them at 6.30 when I got up to see to the scones! Mind you, I'm not holding my breath for it to happen again in a hurry!!

KNACKERED!!

Feet are killing me and my back aches. Time to collapse in front of something mind-numbingly banal on TV I think.

CHICKEN, LEEK, BACON...

... and mushroom crumble in the oven. Don't ask - it's a request from Kevin!! Off down to Morpeth in the gloom shortly. Hate this time of year!!

COOKING A RIB OF BEEF...

.. for tonight's meal. Feels all wrong on a Monday!!

DO THE CLOCKS...

... go back this weekend? I suspect they do. I'm just looking outside now at a grey, foggy morning and feeling quite depressed about the start of winter. Still feel cheated out of summer! Not helped at all by the news on the weather forecast that we may be in for wintry showers on Friday - Nooooo!!!

FOR A SHORT TIME THIS MORNING...

... I was confused about why Charles was putting the Toon tops on the girls! It wasn't wet, frosty, cold or snowy when he took them out... ... Oh God - then I remembered what day it is today! Let the stress begin!!!

HOW DOES IT FEEL?

Without wanting to sound really cheesey, it feels as if I've been set free. For too long my life was completely controlled by cigs and I can't believe that after an hour long session last week I have come out of it as a non-smoker. No pain, no cravings, lots of pride, a bit of disbelief. I've kept the opened packet of JPS in the cupboard where I always used to store my cigs. It hasn't been touched since I smoked my last one at 12.30 last Saturday. I'm not keeping it in case I relapse, but as a measure of how far I've come. Being able to ignore it's presence gives me such a sense of success. I'm totally in control of it now.

IT'S SATURDAY...

... and therefore ONE FULL WEEK since I was a smoker!! Yay!!!!!!

HAD A GOOD OLD CHAT...

... with Christina today, as she was up in Fram for a while. Actually she was seeing her doctor in Alnwick, so Charles took her to that appointment and then brought her back here. She doesn't need to go back until after Christmas, so she's really pleased about that. I've had a morning of shopping and baking - so nowt new there then. Feeling pretty knackered to be honest. Might have to go for 40 winks!!

HAS ANYONE...

... ever cooked roast duck?? I haven't, nor would I ever really want to, but Christina has been asked to roast a duck for Christmas Day lunch - with Tim and his Mum on the farm - and she's naturally somewhat apprehensive. It'll be the first time she's prepared a full Christmas lunch, and that's scary enough, but having to cook something you've never tried before is especially daunting and even more so when it is apparently really difficult to cook properly. I've said we'll do a time plan and get most of the preparation done in advance, but I really think she should either a) ask Tim's Mum to show her how to cook the duck or b) get in lots of practice first or even better c) persuade them to have turkey.

HAVING A MORNING OFF...

... today. Makes a very welcome change actually. Instead of baking I'm off to SAKs to get my hair done, leaving Charles at home to look after the girls. Looking forward to it!

YOU COULD WELL BE RIGHT DANNYMATT...

... I honestly don't know how hypnotherapy works, but I suspect it does exactly what you said, by embedding pertinent phrases that are going to trigger appropriate reactions. I don't feel as if I'm using any willpower at all. I don't feel as if I need to. What I do know is that I have absolutely no desire to light up whatsoever!!!

GOING TO STRUGGLE...

... to get everything into the car this morning! (Ha ha - bet you thought that was going to say "Going to struggle without a smoke today!" but it didn't because I won't!! Seriously, the boot is full and there's limited interior space in my Peugeot, so it's a bit like doing a jigsaw with cake and quiche! Just realised how dark it is this morning. All the lights are on and it's pretty black out there. I suppose it won't be long until the clocks go back. Hate it.

MASSIVE ORDER...

... for the coffee shop tomorrow. Must be expecting a busy day!! Just when I thought I'd done a pretty good job of filling the new freezer up, most of it will be going out tomorrow morning. Feel a bit tired of it all at the moment - which is unfortunate as things are undoubtedly going to get busier over the next few weeks. Maybe I'm feeling a bit low after my cold? Need to pull myself together...

WET, WINDY AND MISERABLE...

... this morning. I've done all the baking I can do without having to venture out to the shops, so as soon as this batch of brownies comes out of the oven I've got to brave the elements and get myself into Morpeth. Still doing okay on the non-smoking front.

FISH AND CHIPS...

... at Amble this afternoon. Had to go and pick up the merc, so decided to have an easy tea before driving back home with the sun at just the wrong angle. To be honest there were times when I couldn't see a thing and just had to pray there was nothing in the way. (Why don't car manufacturers make sun visors that are deep enough for short people to actually be able to benefit from them?) Still doing okay on the non-smoking front. Very proud of myself actually.

MONDAY MORNING...

... and the big question is - can I stay smoke-free when I'm on my own? I suspect the answer is - Of course I can - as I have absolutely no cravings or desire to light up at all. Strange how I've gone off cappuccinos though!

FREEZER'S HERE!!

Excellent service. Ordered yesterday, delivered and set up this afternoon. Just need to fill it now!!

NO AMOUNT...

... of well-meant advice would have made any difference Dannymatt. I knew perfectly well what the dangers of smoking were, but being an addict I was able to set those aside whenever I needed a fix. It would have made no difference WHO had bullied, cajoled, persuaded, harangued - I had to make the decision myself AND needed to do it the only way I knew would work. It's only been just over one day. I may not see it through. But I reckon the first day should probably be the worst - and it's actually been a doddle!!!

OH YES!!!

I can now proudly announce that it has been over 24 hours since I was a smoker!! Hypnotherapy was always going to be the route I needed to go down. Claire knew of someone who is qualified in this field and she and James accompanied me yesterday. I think they were possibly more nervous than I was. In my head I had already convinced myself that I didn't want to be a smoker any more and that message was reinforced during the session. I've never been hypnotised or in a trance before, and I have to confess to wondering if it really was working while I was in my hour long session yesterday. I was aware of noises around me - birdsong and rain - and there were times when I was able to analyse why the therapist was saying what she was saying - but despite those distractions, it appears to be working so far. I had a bit of a restless night, but every time I woke I was telling myself "I'm a non-smoker". Today has been okay, actually. One thing I've noticed is that I have no desire to drink coffee. I wonder if that's because I always used to smoke with a cup of coffee? I've kept busy, but no more than usual. Just occasionally I catch myself thinking about smoking, but only because it was so intertwined with my routine and I now need to find something to fill the gap, although I imagine that what I perceive as a gap now will soon be absorbed into the general mellee and will cease to exist before too long. So, there you have it. I was a smoker, but I'm not any more!

STILL...

... doing okay!!

DOING OKAY...

... so far!!!

JUST PLACED AN ORDER...

... for a huge freezer that will arrive tomorrow and is specifically manufactured to work in a garage or outhouse. Yay - I can now get up to speed with loads of baking!!!!!

NOT SURE WHAT TO WRITE TODAY!!!

Wasn't going to mention this but... ... today could be a very important day for me. Not in a business sense, but in terms of fighting a particular demon that's lived with me for years. Not going to say any more in case it doesn't work, but I'm really hoping for a breakthrough today!

JUST WANT TO SAY...

... that it was absolutely fab having everyone round last night. James, Claire, Ghristina, Tim, Hannah and Jake - what lovely company you all are. I was so happy to see Christina relaxed, laughing and generally poking fun at herself, all things that would never have been in evidence a year ago. She is really making remarkable progress and I'm filled with pride on her behalf. Bad thing about yesterday? I started a cold. It hit at lunchtime like a ton of bricks and, despite liberal doses of day/night nurse, I'm feeling pretty lousy. Haven't got time for this!!! Charles has taken a mega-delivery over to Radcliffes this morning, including the birthday cake for Ignacio. I'm busy restocking the freezer, although I'm running short on ingredients and will need to break off to go down to Morpeth in a while. Might treat myself to an espresso frappe while I'm there to cheer me up a bit! Much nicer than honey and lemon, but possibly not as good for me - but hey ho who cares????

3.30 ALREADY!!

And I've just sat down with my laptop for the first time today. Been a bit hectic so far. Christina arrived early on as she needed a lift to Alnwick for a business appointment and then a session with her therapist. (Both seem to have gone well) Charles needed me to drive my car over to Amble as his Merc was going in for a service. (Absolutely HATE the drive to Amble - there is no direct route at all and it takes FOREVER.) Managed to throw together the birthday cake for Kevin - well it's for Ignacio actually, but Kevin ordered it. Not wonderful, but at a day's notice it'll have to do. Got a houseful this evening - 8 of us I do believe - so I've been cooking up pots of pasta sauces, including a rather fabulous chicken, salmon, mushroom and tarragon sauce which tastes divine. Apple pie. pavlova and profiteroles are all ready for pud, so nobody should leave hungry!! Time for a coffee I think!

SO BASICALLY...

... when Kevin says, "Jump!" I just say, "How high?" When am I going to learn?

JESMOND COFFEE SHOP OWNER...

... AND TALENTED PHOTOGRAPHER... ,,, BEATEN TO A PULP BY SUPPLIER OF BAKED GOODS. THIS FOLLOWS AN EARLIER ATTACK BY HIS SPANISH-BORN WIFE ON DISCOVERING THAT HE HAD FAILED TO ORDER THE BIRTHDAY CAKE FOR HER SON ON FRIDAY DESPITE BEING REMINDED WEEKS AGO. UPON BEING TOLD THAT HE WAS TOO LATE TO PLACE AN ORDER HE NEVERTHELESS WHEEDLED AND PLEADED UNTIL SUPPLIER OF BAKED GOODS CAVED IN. IN MY DREAMS I'VE BEATEN HIM TO A PULP AND CARMEN HAS NO DOUBT DONE THE SAME.

AAAARRRRGGGH!!

Wouldn't you know it - the fridge freezer in the kitchen has started making horrendous noises all of a sudden. Certainly sounds like death throes and yet it's only a couple of years old. Wonder if we could replace it with two freezers? As they're built in I don't know if it's possible, but maybe worth investigating. It would leave me a fridge down, but I still have a huge larder fridge and another smaller one, so should be able to do it. Need to investigate...

YEAH - YOU'D BETTER WATCH YOUR...

... REARGUARD DANNYMATT. A) I CAN'T STOP BAKING, AND WILL BE DOING MUCH MORE OF IT SHORTLY B0 IF I LIMIT MYSELF TO THE SPACE I'VE GOT I'LL NEVER CATCH UP WITH ORDERS C) THE IDEA OF A FREEZER IN THE BEDROOM IS ABSOLUTELY ONE THAT IS SO NOT AESTHETICALLY PLEASING So, I'm going to bite the bullet and order one of the rather expensive chest types that are guaranteed to operate at -15, and just hope it doesn't get any colder than that this winter. Thank you so much for your help!

STILL TRYING TO VISUALISE...

... a freezer in the bedroom dannymatt. Unfortunately, I really can't see it somehow!!

HMMM...

... told ya! Nuff said!

SETTING OFF SOON...

... to pick up Matthew and then James. Light lunch in Gosforth, then off to the match. Can't see us repeating the success of last season, but who knows? Just baked two gorgeous cinnamon, walnut and sultana loaves. Must stop doing this as we end up eating far too much and I haven't really got room in the freezers at the moment. Am trying to find a chest freezer that'll operate in the shed as I'm struggling for space now and will do so even more when Appleby's take off. We've looked at the available room in the kitchen and breakfast area and have come to the conclusion that we can't get anything else in, so the only alternative is the shed. Trouble is, there aren't that many makes and models that work when temperatures drop below freezing, so we're limited to what we can get. Plus, they are pretty expensive as well. Any ideas anyone?

THIS MAY NOT BODE WELL...

... for the result of the match today, but we're breaking with tradition and having our pre-match meal at Adriano's Deli in Gosforth! You have been warned!!!

BEAUTIFUL SUNNY MORNING...

... bit chilly though, but a lovely Autumnal day so far. Much too nice to be slaving in the kitchen, which sadly, is where I am. To be honest. I'm a little surprised to discover that it's still morning. We had a really early start today, and I seem to have been cooking for hours - was sure it would be about 2pm!! Had an emergency delivery to do for Kevin this morning. Thankfully Charles took it across while I got started on the baking. I think he's picking Christina up on his way back so we can have a bit of time with her. Just checked the kick-off time for tomorrow. Just as well as we thought it was 3pm and it is, in fact, a 4.00 start.

SICKENING NEWS TODAY

I suppose sadly, that it was not unexpected, but hearing that the abduction of little April Jones has now become a murder investigation is the saddest thing. I cannot possibly begin to imagine what her family is going through, but know that the pain must be simply unbearable. Until you are a parent you cannot imagine the depth of love you have for your children - no matter how old they are. I remember vividly the days when James was so sick with meningitis and his life was in danger. Nothing will ever erase the fear and despair we felt at that time. Imagining what that little girl went through must be the cruellest form of torture for her family - and yet they will not be able to avoid doing that. My heart goes out to them.

JUST WANT TO SAY...

... we're just home after spending a delightful evening with Christina and Tim (and Joan, Tim's Mum). Christina cooked a fab meal, she really worked hard, but was happy, relaxed and lovely company. What an unbelievable change during the last few months. I'm so incredibly proud of my daughter!

EARLY RETIREMENT?????

What's that Dannymatt? Charles is more retired than me - and he's still working!! But yes, I know what you mean!

LOVELY EVENING...

... with James and Claire, although I've eaten far too much and feel absolutely stuffed. I think they enjoyed their 'Sunday dinner on Wednesday' though! Watched two more episodes from Series 1 of Downton after dinner. I think we're all addicted to it actually. Charles is delighted that it's the start of his weekend!!

HELLO BLOG!!

Haven't got a clue where today has gone. Was up early (After a pretty good night's sleep actually. The girls didn't wake until gone 5.00!!!!) sorted out the delivery, raced back to Morpeth, did the shopping and met a friend for a quick coffee, then sorted out the utility room when I got home as it had got completely out of control with baking stuff and I'd got to the point where I couldn't find anything, then spent the afternoon baking and getting a meal ready for James and Claire tonight. Every day seems to be a variation on pretty much the same theme, doesn't it. (Might start copying and pasting!!)

ONLY HAD TO GET UP...

... once last night, and that was at 4.30 by which time I've usually been up at least twice during the past few weeks. Got the radio tuned into Five Live and playing all night, so maybe, just maybe, it had a bit of an impact. Hope fully, today should be relatively straightforward, with a bit of baking and shopping on the cards. Nowt different there then! James and Claire are coming for dinner tomorrow night and have requested roast chicken and all the trimmings, so I'll probably shop for that. Yum yum!!

BOUGHT A RADIO...

... this morning, just a little portable thing, £8 from Asda, to go in the kitchen and leave on at night in the hopes of distracting the girls from whatever noises they are hearing outside resulting in our broken sleep. I was up with them three times again last night and it's beginning to wear a bit thin. So, on the advice of the vet, we're going to give this a try! Don't hold your breath!!!

JUST TO REMIND YOU...

... THAT THIS REALLY IS A BLOG ABOUT LILY AND ROSE, HERE THEY ARE...

FINALLY...

... got an order through this afternoon, so have spent the last three hours getting everything ready for tomorrow. Looking forward to another couple of Downton episodes this evening!!

WAITING FOR...

... KEVIN AGAIN! Sent him a text at 11,30 asking what he needs for tomorrow, got a reply saying he'd go and look and since then... ... nothing. As he lives a mere 30 second walk away from the coffee shop I am somewhat bemused by the hour and a half delay.

DOWNTON ABBEY!!!

How have Charles and I managed to remain oblivious to the delights of this costume drama? Thanks to James and Claire that has now been corrected, but we're playing catch up with the two series we've missed. Unfortunately, we're watching the second one, waiting for the first one to arrive from Amazon and having to record the current series, which we can't watch until we've viewed the first! Got that?

9.30AM

And Kevin has been and gone, taking with him trays of quiche, bakewells, lemon drizzle, coffee and walnut and a rather delicious sultana, walnut and cinnamon loaf. Quite like the idea of him coming to collect stuff - might encourage this a bit more!!

GOOD TO SEE...

... dannymatt back in cryptic circulation. Oh how we've missed him!!

MADE IT CLEAR TO KEVIN...

... that there would be absolutely no chance of a delivery tomorrow. I need a break, even if it's just a day. I've spent all afternoon baking and filling the freezer to capacity and can look forward to a quiet day tomorrow. However, never daunted, Kevin decides to get round me by begging for more quiche WHICH HE WILL COME AND COLLECT FIRST THING IN THE MORNING!!!! Could I refuse? Of course not! #willieverlearn

BIT OF A MANIC MORNING!

Having had no order from Kevin yesterday I was somewhat annoyed to get a text this morning wanting stuff. Apparently he wrote the text but forgot to send it!! So, although I would have been within my rights to refuse, I managed to get some stuff together and we dropped it off after our visit to the vets. The vet was lovely and put our minds at rest about the strange little lump on the back of Rose's foreleg. She thinks it's a callous and probably nothing to worry about, but suggested we keep an eye on it in case anything changes. Right, got to go and get on now. Back later...

BUSY, BUSY, BUSY!!

Started before daybreak again as we had to get to the RVI by 8.45 and this meant leaving home by 7.40ish, which we did, but still only got into the carpark at the hospital at exactly the right time. Charles must have had the first appointment and yet they still kept him waiting until 9am. Hardly surprising waiting time gets ridiculous during the day if they can't even get the first appointment dealt with on time. After that it was home via Jesmond (dropping off a little emergency order and collecting all my crates) and Sainsbury's (stocking up for the next round of baking). Once home I got started straightaway and now have lasagne, quiche, cheese scones, shortbread and brownies made. Charles has gone to pick up Christina to bring her home for a while and Tim is coming to collect her later, so we're all having an Indian takeaway together. (Nice, don't need to cook!)

SO, NUFC...

... haven't won at Old Trafford in 40 years. Can't see that changing tonight either!

SEEMS A LITTLE CALMER...

... this morning. The rain has finally stopped (for now) and the wind is less strong than it was yesterday. Just watching the footage from Morpeth on the local news. Talk about a lucky escape - although not for everyone unfortunately. Got a normal day ahead of me today - delivery, stocking up, baking nd getting a chilli ready for James who's coming round this evening.

REALLY DON'T ENVY...

... anyone who's out on the roads this morning. What a nightmare this weather is. I've just heard that Northumberland are advising parents not to send their children to school today. Bet Charles wishes they'd announced that earlier! I WAS going to go to Morpeth later, but think I might not bother as the police are advising drivers to undertake essential journeys only, and really coffee at Central bean isn't THAT essential. On a worrying note, I found what I thought was a matted section of hair on Rose last night, but on closer inspection discovered that it is in fact a thickened area of skin behind her right foreleg. We're going to take her to the vets to get it checked out, but I'm quite anxious about it. I hate it when there's anything wrong with the girls and just hope and pray that it turns out to be nothing serious.

WET, WINDY AND MISERABLE!

Yuk! What a horrible morning! For the first time this autumn we got up in the dark. Oh how I hate the onset of winter!! The girls are clearly not ready to start the day as they are both snoozing contentedly, having endured a miserably wet walk first thing. Actually, I'm not surprised they're still sleepy, having had me up no less than three times during the night. If I didn't have to go to Jesmond, I might be joining them in forty winks. But I DO indeed have to go to Jesmond, although I'm hearing on the news that there's an accident on the A1, so my journey may be slow today.

THE NEXT TIME...

... Hatem Ben Arfa steps up to take a penalty... ... for God's sake JUST LET HIM DO IT!! What a rubbishy game that was. Yes, we got a result, but it was so incredibly frustrating to watch. The best bit about today? Going for lunch with James, Matthew and Charles to Fujiyamas. Absolutely delicious and our chef was ON FIRE!! (Not literally!)

SHATTERED NOW!!

When I woke up this morning I had great hopes for a relatively relaxing day, but that hasn't turned out to be the case. I blame myself of course, because there were things that could happily have waited for a day or two, but once I'd thought about them I just had to get them done. Consequently, I now have three Christmas cakes pretty nearly done. They're only mock ups on sponge cakes, but I wanted to think through this year's "collection" and the best way to do that is by just getting on and making them. I've tried to come up with three very different designs that are relatively quick to put together, but still look good. Also - my oven is now gleaming! Unfortunately, it won't stay this way for long, but right now it looks pretty sparkling! Made some tiny little sponge cakes thanks to an amazingly clever cake tin from Lakeland. Tiny little coffee and walnut cakes and Victoria sponges. They look really cute. Also cracked the problem of Kevin's penchant for chicken pies. Instead of making one big pie, I've bought some individual pie dishes, concocted a recipe and ended up with some rather tasty little pies. God knows what he'll serve them with - but that's up to Kevin!! Going to get ready for bed soon. Charles is snoring away already - very loudly!!

DO I FEEL GUILTY...

... for not writing on the blog today? NO. I've been far too busy with deliveries, shopping, baking chicken and mushroom pies for Kevin (don't ask!) and creating prototype Christmas cakes. Anyway, the blog is not my master!!

HAVING A LAZY AFTERNOON!!

Can't remember the last time this happened!! It's really rather pleasant though. Can't do any baking really as the freezers are full to bursting point, so need to get some stuff out for Monday before I can make anything new. So, instead of making anything myself, I'm spending the afternoon watching all the baking programmes on telly. Bliss!!

SUNSHINE AND SHOWERS...

... gave us this view today...

CAN'T BELIEVE IT'S 2.30 ALREADY!

We had an early start as we had an emergency delivery to do to Radcliffes followed by an appointment at the eye department of the RVI for Charles at 9.30. We had a drive round Fenham where we'd seen an amazing property, but weren't convinced about the area. Then made the big mistake of driving round Bridge Park in Gosforth and discovered a tranquil, leafy and quaint development with a single track road that's situated just off the Great North Road but actually feels as if you're in a pretty little village. The property we'd gone to check out is probably quite small and a bit more like a cottage than the others we've looked at, but full of character. It needs a bit of work and has planning permission for a single storey extension, but nothing too daunting. Location-wise it's idyllic and we now dearly wish we hadn't bothered looking because someone is going to snap this one up pretty quickly. Just wish someone would show some interest in our bungalow!!!!

LOOKING FORWARD TO...

... James and Claire coming round this evening and POSSIBLY Christina and Tim joining us as well. It would be lovely if we could all get together, even though it is just mince and dumplings for dinner!! Mind you, I've taken time out to make James's favourite steamed chocolate sponge and chocolate sauce, so that might raise the comfort food bar a little!!

JUST HAD A LOVELY TEN MINUTES...

... relaxing with a magazine, lying on the bed and accompanied by my two little girlies snoring softly by my side!

HMMM. THINK WE'VE BEEN SPOILED!!

Obviously eating at JDHH and Cafe 21 has ruined us for the likes of the Cook and Barker which is where we've just spent our 35th wedding anniversary. Not sure where to start with this one, other than to say that the staff probably wish they'd never lid eyes on us. Visually, I have to say, the food was fab. However, when it came to eating it, it was a completely different story. My starter of asparagus and poached egg nestling on a tiny muffin and coddled in hollandaise and tarragon was lovely - apart from a complete lack of tarragon. believe me, I know my tarragon and this dish had been nowhere near it. Main course: Charles asked for a medium rare sirloin which arrived blue and was probably the worst steak he's eaten. His handcut chips had clearly been handcut in the Findus food factory, certainly not on the premises. My pork was overcooked to the point of cremation and the crackling, which stood two inches tall, was really just a cube of fat with a crispy top. Dessert wasn't much better. Charles opted for cheese because he reasoned they couldn't mess that up, and he was right, they didn't. My white chocolate terrine was a different story, being granular and separating on the plate as it defrosted. Note: it should have been reached out of the freezer at least 15 minutes before serving. Good points: nice bottle of red, perfectly cooked veg, lovely presentation. Notably, after the main course, when our waitress was clearing the table I had to make a point of asking her if she wanted to know what we thought of the food, as she had clearly been forewarned that we were difficult customers and was not gong to instigate any discussion about the quality of the food. Needless to say, we told her exactly what we thought!!

WHY BOTHER...

... attempting to make jaffa cakes, when McVities already make perfectly good ones? This is the question I am asking myself, having spent an abortive morning in the kitchen cutting sponge cake into discs, making a vast quantity of very gloopy orange jelly and covering every surface and utensil (and myself) in dark melted chocolate. End result? tastes like a jaffa cake, but looks a right mess. Will I bother again? Hmmm, let's think about that one... ... er that would be a 'no' then!! (I even managed to overcook the apple pies that I was working on alongside the damn jaffa cakes, so am doubly annoyed with myself!)

HERE I AM!!

Back from the usual coffee shop run. No Kevin this morning, so I was in and out pretty fast. Stopped off in Morpeth and was back home by 11.00. Having a bit of a fridge clear out this morning. (Just one of them mind!) It's in pretty dire need of defrosting, so that's what I'm doing. Got stuff all over the kitchen worktops at the moment, so not very happy. Just put a batch of salted caramel brownies in the oven. Somehow, I can't imagine that they're going to work, but I've actually used a recipe for them and followed it faithfully, so we'll see! Oh and I've just remembered we've got a match tonight - aaaaarrrrgh!!

THE GREAT NORTH RUN...

... always fills me with such pride. Am thinking especially of Rachel, Hannah and Jake who are running this morning. Good luck to them and to everyone who's taking part today.

SO HERE AM I...

... trying to eat sensibly and to cut back on all the sampling I've been doing recently... ... and I decide to devise a recipe for cinnamon, sultana and walnut bread... ...which looks divine and, after numerous little tastes I have to say... ... is absolutely delicious and totally irresistible! Damn, damn, damn!!

HATE IT WHEN...

... NUFC aren't playing till Monday!! Mind you, I suspect our game will be a tough one, especially with Tiote and Krul out. Wonder what'll happen in the Liverpool/Sunderland match? Should be an interesting one. Not too much one the cards today. Charles needs to go present shopping for his Mum's birthday. He's going across to Ullswater tomorrow to meet up with the family for afternoon tea. I think Christina is going too. But Cinders is staying at home to look after the girls as it would be too long to leave them and too far to take them. I actually feel as if it's a bit of a day off today. There's nothing really pressing to do for Radcliffes as everything is pretty much organised. I might play around with cake pops again and I really need to be thinking about Christmas cakes, but I can't quite get in the mood for this yet!

JUST FOUND...

... a newt happily swimming around in the girls' outdoor drinking bowl. Fortunately for the newt, I got to it before the girls did! Charles has now taken it for a little walk down the garden, well out of harm's way. Newts always remind me of this ridiculous joke about the man who went into a bar with a newt on his shoulder, was asked it's name and replied 'Tiny" and was then asked why it was called Tiny to which he replied, "Because it's minute." I tried to tell this rather sad little joke once, only I started, "A man went into a bar with a lizard on his shoulder...' - as you can imagine the punchline didn't really work!!

MAMMOTH DELIVERY TODAY!!

Kevin must be having a really good week in the coffee shop. Wonder how he's managing as he's on his own in there for the next fortnight! I'll be off with the delivery in a few minutes. Charles has gone into school for a meeting - on his day off! Hopefully he'll be back just after lunch.

JAMES AND CLAIRE!!!

Just checking to see if you two are reading this! If you are, and if you have time on your next visit to town, could you pick up the Lakeland Oven Cleaner that we talked about last night? I'll give you the money!!!

WHAT A DIFFERENCE...

... it makes to the girls when Charles is at home! They are both happily settled on the sofa with him watching Chris Moyles' penultimate morning show. If it was just me here they'd be wandering about the house aimlessly, just waiting for his return. It's a little upsetting to be honest. I spend all my time with them and all they really want is their Dad! Charles reckons it's because I don't sit still long enough for them to snuggle up, whereas he does - and I suspect he could be right.

HELL'S BELLS!!!

Charles has just come home from work and has informed me that he has seven orders for Christmas cakes already! I hadn't even thought about them, let alone planned this year's 'range'! Better get thinking then!!

BIT LATE TODAY!!

On the blog I mean. Mind you I seem to have been a bit late all morning thanks to getting stuck for the best part of an hour in traffic due to an accident near Gosforth. Annoyingly, I'd just past the Seaton Burn turnoff when everything ground to a halt. A few metres sooner and I could have avoided the hold up completely. Then, because I as running late, I decided to shop at Asda in Gosforth instead of swinging into Morpeth as I usually do. This was a mistake on two fronts. 1) I don't know the store layout sufficiently well to be able to whizz round (I write my Morrisons list in store order!) and 2) Having chosen the shortest queue I ended up behind the woman who wanted to buy the last Barbie pink folder in the store and for which there was no product details at all, resulting in endless searches and consultations and culminating in an executive decision from Mr Store Manager himself who let her have it for 50p. This took about twenty minutes to resolve (Could have been into Morpeth in less time) and the woman who was causing the hold up at no point apologised to anyone in the queue for keeping them waiting. Grrrrrr!! Anyway, I'm back home now and have batches of bakewells and brownies in the oven, with scones lined up for the next oven slot. Chilli is mixed and marinading ready for when James and Claire come round later. AND - I reached a loaf out of the freezer last night that I'd made a few weeks ago and forgotten all about. It's a cinnamon and walnut loaf and I've just had a thick sliced toasted with a cappuccino - and it was heavenly!!! Unfortunately I can't really remember how I made it as I think it was sort of a recipe that went wrong - but ended up so right!

SPENT A LOVELY EVENING...

... with Christina and Tim last night. Tim had come up for a bike ride in Thrunton Woods, but got rained off so was able to join us for a meal and a chat. I honestly can't remember seeing Christina look so happy for years. I managed to do a major sort out in the freezers yesterday and now feel much better organised. It's amazing how much stuff I rediscovered! I think I've got enough scones and brownies to keep the coffee shop going for a month!! Popping into Morpeth in a while, as soon as the apple pie comes out of the oven...

SOLVED THE PROBLEM...

... of the pony that wouldn't stay upright!! Just gave him a bucket of hay!!

HOW CAN...

... and afternoon tea comprising tiny sandwiches, mini scones and babycakes be SO filling? Very enjoyable but absolutely stuffed! Happy Birthday on Tuesday to Claire!!

OKAY!

Stable cake done, apart from one wretched pony who doesn't want to stick and is currently supported by a wad of kitchen roll! Lasagne and quiche made and chilling. Charles has cut the grass - hooray! Now we're going to chill for a little while before we go off to meet up with Claire and James to kick the birthday celebrations off in style over afternoon tea at JDHH. Mind you, I think we're calling in at the farm first to drop an ironing board off for Christina...

JUST FINISHED!!

Admittedly thee have been a couple of (welcome) interruptions during the day, but I think I've achieved a lot nevertheless. The stables cake, which wasn't even started this morning, is pretty much done, with just a bit of finishing off to do tomorrow. The coffee shop order is well under way and I just need to do the lasagne and quiche. It was lovely to have coffee with James this morning and even lovelier to be joined by Sean for a while. This afternoon we found Christina in the midst of the burger and hot dogs at Thorneyford, happily serving customers who were attending the cycling event and looking thoroughly at home on the farm. It was wonderful to see her looking so relaxed and content. I have a feeling Tim has a lot to do with this!

UP EARLY...

... cakes in the oven, pastry rolled and resting - me knackered already!! Going off to Morpeth to meet James in a while. Quick coffee, chat and a bit of shopping, then back home for focaccia making, before going to see Christina at Tim's house where they're having a bit of a do for his cyclocross (?) mates. Should I be wearing bicycle clips I wonder? After that it'll be back to the kitchen where hopefully I'll be covering the sponges for the stable cake. Oh, and making bakewells to replace the ones that went out yesterday. Tomorrow will follow a similar pattern in the morning and then we're going to Jesmond Dene House for afternoon tea to celebrate the birthday on Tuesday of my lovely Daughter-in-Law. Looking forward to that!!

SO, JUST TO ILLUSTRATE...

... how much Radcliffes controls my life (and yes, I know, I foolishly let it) - we took a huge delivery in this morning, then left Jesmond in relaxed mood, driving leisurely round Gosforth to look at areas we might eventually like to move to, had lunch at the Cook and Barker, then picked up the girls from Woofcuts where they'd been having their hair and nails done (Lily trembled all over when she got there. (Apparently she would be absolutely fine when we left, but I still walked down the path feeling as if I'd just left my three-year-old at nursery for the first time!) All fine so far. Spent the latter part of the afternoon replacing as much stuff as possible for the coffee shop, happy in the knowledge that once this was done I could have a relatively relaxed weekend AND could concentrate on the stables birthday cake I've got to complete by Wednesday. AND THEN KEVIN RANG! Heart sank! He needed everything I'd just spent the afternoon making, plus more stuff that was in the freezer - TONIGHT!! Foolishly of course I agreed. Now beating myself up about being too soft with him and only having myself to blame, so no one needs to come on here telling me as much. Thank you!

OKAY DANNYMATT...

... so it was a little early, by some people's standards, to be writing about wasting the morning at just gone 10am - but that's like lunchtime to me due to the time I'm up and about! Retired? Yeah, I wonder what happened to that concept? Charles and I were talking last night about just how much time is being given over to Radcliffes for not a great return. It's pretty much full time work for peanuts. Might need a rethink!

BIT OF A...

... frustrating morning. I'm hanging around waiting to go to the docs. Charles was all ready to set off to Gosforth where he was due to let the plumber in to Rachel and James's place, only to get a text saying he'll be two hours late. He is going to pick up some stuff from the cake decorating shop for me which will now be correspondingly late arriving. I can't really get on with anything right now because it either takes too long or I haven't got the equipment and am waiting for Charles and the postman before I have what I need. Feel as though I've had a completely wasted morning!

HAD A BRIEF BUT VERY PLEASANT...

... visit from our son this evening. Much of the talk was about the house, although we did take a break from that to view the photos from the wedding on the TV. Kevin may have problems when it comes to running the coffee shop, but he certainly knows the photography business. Absolutely wonderful. Tomorrow seems to be filling up nicely. Charles is going over to Rachel and James's to let the plumber in and to hang about a bit while he's working. I'm going to the docs in the morning - just a prescription review - then I think I'm meeting Christina for coffee. I've got to turn my hand to making lasagne for Kevin following a request today, so I may do that tomorrow and I also want to have a go at cake pops. I've resisted up to now because I suspect they're a bit of a faff, but I have a feeling they may go down a storm with the kids in the coffee shop at Applebys Bookshop. Tired now so may have an early night!