BACK AGAIN!!

There, that didn't take long did it? Brilliant journeys both ways. Had lovely cuddles with the girls. Great to spend a day with Helen, away from all the rubbish that we've had to deal with here. Went into Ilkley, took Lily and Rose for a stroll round the shops and had coffee and scones at a lovely little cafe in the sunshin. Mum came round this afternonn and we (tried to) put the world to rights - or our little part of it anyway (failed miserably though) However, we did have some big laughs when we reminisced about some of our holiday experiences, especially the time that Helen had packed particularly lightweight sleeping bags for one of our boating holidays only for Bill to hold his up disdainfully and exclaim, "I've slept under thicker Kleenex than this!" Oh happy, happy days - where have they gone?

SETTING OFF...

... for Yorkshire. Going to see my sister and my Mum. Will have lovely cuddles with Lily and Rose on the journey. Hope we manage to forget about everything that's going on at home for a while.

FINALLY...

... someone is taking our concerns seriously. #aburdenshared...

I'M UP!!

But am the only one at the moment. The girls are snuggled in with their Dad and Christina has still not emerged from her room. We've got a delivery to take to Centurion and then I'm meeting a friend for coffee. Obviously we'll not be sitting outside for that as winter appears to have returned. Hopefully, we're going to Helen's tomorrow. It will get us away from the house for a day and give me a chance to see my Mum. But a lot will depend on how Christina is when she gets up.

SO THE FALCONS...

... are back in the Premiership and I really enjoyed it, even though I hadn't got a clue what was happening for most of the time. I enjoyed the atmosphere on the South Stand, the fact that both teams fans were mixed in together and, amazingly, the fact that you can actually drink alcohol on the terraces. Who knew? Got home to find that Christina has returned. She was in bed before we returned, so I'm sure we'll find out more tomorrow.

HAIR DONE!

And sprayed to within an inch of its life as it's blowing a gale out there and we're off to Kingston Park later on for the rugby and I really don't want to waste £55. I quite like that Claire has already made it look a bit like a bird's nest. Mind you, I did say I wanted a messy look, so I've got what I asked for. We're meeting up with Helen and Bill later and then being joined by Rachel and James and Claire and our James. Wish it was a bit warmer!!

5.50PM...

... and I've just sat down for a minute. Crazy day! Basically I wanted to try to get the baking done today for Radcliffes AND Centurion AND to replace as much as possible. Not an easy task, but I think I've managed pretty well and it should mean that Wednesday is an easier day than it usually is and should allow me a bit of time to go and have my colour done at SAKs and to meet up with Helen and Bill during the afternoon before we go to the rugby in the evening. It's been a strange day on the emotion front though. I think the whole uncertainty with Christina's welfare at the moment is beginning to take it's toll and I spent quite a bit of the morning on the verge of tears. The fact that this was happening while I was in Morpeth wasn't brilliant. If anyone had said anything nice to me that would have REALLY set me off!!

BIT DRIZZLY AT TIMES...

... this afternoon, but not enough to halt the gardening in Gosforth. I've discovered that lopping trees is great fun and have been allowed to yield the loppers with abandon!! It's surprising how much four people can get through. We've had a good tidy up, taken loads to the tip and bought and planted bedding plants. I can't get over the quality of the soil! It's so easy to work with, unlike our clods of clay. Ah well - just another reason to move to Gosforth!!

ANOTHER...

... lovely morning! But, according to the forecast, this may be it for a while. So, to make the most of it, we've got a BBQ lunch planned before we go and give James and Claire a hand in the garden. Feeling hungry already and yet I would normally never think of having lunch!! They should be here shortly, along with Claire's Mum and Dad, who will be taking the Peugeot away for a week!! Got a couple of cakes in the oven ready for freezing until I know what the coffee shops are needing this week. Made a few more centres for sugar roses and have got those drying in the kitchen. So quite a productive morning so far...

TOP DOWN!!

Yes, it was the perfect day to have the top down on the Peugeot. Hope Margaret has a few days when she can do the same while she's borrowing it. I have to say it's gleaming now - not a sign of any bird poop, thank goodness. We seem to have got tomorrow pretty much planned. James and Claire are coming round, and then Bob and Margaret are coming to collect the car. They can't stay long, but the rest of us are having a BBQ lunch (just watch, it'll rain) then I think the plan s that we all go to Gosforth and tackle the back garden this time!! Later in the week we're all going to the rugby and, coffee shops permitting, we might even get a day away in Yorkshire on Friday. Yay!!

I'M LENDING MY PEUGEOT...

... to Claire's Mum for the week as she's going to be without hers. I actually haven't driven it for months so we're going to take it out for a bit of a run in a while. Could do with going through a carwash too I think.

ANOTHER BEAUTIFUL MORNING!!

What's going on? This must be summer. I've just dropped in the idea of doing a bit of gardening here to Charles and his first question was, "What needs to be done?" Ha ha ha!! So, where do I start?

HAD A LOVELY AFTERNOON...

... in Gosforth with James. Spent a good few hours, in beautiful weather, tidying up the front garden.Clearly the previous owners were not gardeners!! But it looks much more presentable now. Hope Claire likes it when she gets home!! Think we may be going to the falcons match on Wednesday night. I know it's a bit different for us, but I'd love to see them get back into the Premier League. There may be a few of us going so it should be a good night out.

HEY!!

It's Bank Holiday weekend - and the SUN is SHINING!! What's going on?? We've spent a leisurely morning around the house doing a few chores. I've made some more flowers for a certain wedding cake and Charles has cut the grass with our newly-serviced lawn mower!! In a while we're going off to Gosforth to give James a hand with his garden. Hmmm... can't ever remember him doing the same for us, but there you go!!

HAVE DONE A QUICK TRIAL RUN...

... of the main flowers for Rachel and James's wedding cake. The wedding isn't until December, but the cake they've chosen has huge handmade blooms around each tier and I wanted to work out how much time I need to allow for making them. Considering I've worked all afternoon and have only made 4 blooms I think I'd probably better start now!!

NOT A GOOD NIGHT!!

It was blowing a gale - and still is! The noise of the wind obviously disturbed the girls so I had to get up to them twice and on the third time just took them into bed with me. Lily was great. She slept in her little bed on the floor. Rose was having none of that and insisted on cuddling up to her Mum! This was fine except a) she snores, b) she gets very warm and c) her hair is tickly. Consequently, the girls have had a very good sleep thank you - and I haven't.

DESPITE ALL THE ...

... carry on with the bounced cheque yesterday, and bearing in mind that Christina decided NOT to come and see me, I still had a lovely evening. Charles has gone off to Preston this morning, having done two deliveries on the way. (One of these very nearly didn't happen (make link here between two statements made in this post!!) but all appears to have been resolved.) He's only away overnight, so once he gets back we'll have to have a think about what we're going to do with the weekend. I'd completely forgotten that it's a Bank Holiday, but I'm glad it is because that means radcliffes is closed on Monday and that gives me a day off. Yay!!

YOU WILL NOT BELIEVE THIS...

... but it is snowing in Fram!! Just wet stuff, but it's snow nevertheless!

IT GOT BETTER!!

The birthday, that is. Actually it got worse before it got better. Christina's mental health seems to be deteriorating rapidly and that is a huge worry to both of us. She hasn't been in touch with me at all today, although she sent a card and present via Charles. I also had a letter from the bank informing me that a cheque that I had paid into my account last week has subsequently bounced, so I was really ticked off about that. At one point I as feeling really low, but then Hannah, James, Claire and Charles came home and everything was okay again. Thank you for some fab presents all of you. I fel totally spoiled!!

IT'S MY BIRTHDAY!

I'm not good with birthdays. Mine anyway. And I certainly will not be good with next year's Big Day which unfortunately ends in a big fat zero!!

ESTATE AGENT RANG THIS AFTERNOON!!

Finally after all this time, someone wants to view our bungalow. Brilliant. Coming on Thursday afternoon... ...Five minutes later... ... Estate agent rang again to inform me that they have changed their minds and only want to spend £250,000!! Brilliant. Is it EVER going to happen?

OKLAHOME TORNADO

Shocking devastation. And yet such a stoic attitude - "We've picked ourselves up before and we'll do it again." Have just wept over the footage of the elderly lady who thought she'd lost everything and then discovered her little terrier alive in the rubble. Cannot begin to imagine what they are going through.

TIME FOR A CUPPA I THINK!!

Been pretty busy this morning, The usual delivery and shopping followed by baking. Have tried a new recipe for pineapple, ginger and coconut cake today - not an obvious combination but it actually smells wonderful.Wonder if I should have a slice with my cuppa - purely in the interests of research of course.

ACTUALLY, REALLY ENJOYED TODAY!

Lunch at Fujiyamas was great because we had loads of time to just enjoy it at a leisurely pace. Fab food, good company and great atmosphere. Even enjoyed the match despite coming away with another defeat. In my opinion we at least deserved a draw. It was good to see the team playing with more confidence than during the tense matches when relegation was still a possibility. Now we have a couple of weeks off and then the frustration of the transfer window starts!! Have just watched Case Histories. I imagine that anyone who doesn't know Kate Atkinson's style of writing may have found it somewhat perplexing and difficult to watch, but I thoroughly enjoyed it and can't wait for next week. Okay, might try to have a reasonably early night I think. Still need to get over the horrendous start to the weekend.

LAST GAME OF THE SEASON!

To be honest I'm more excited about pre-match lunch at Fujiyamas!! Home to Arsenal? Can't see a performance from us, despite the £1million bonus Mike Ashley has promised to the non-playing staff if his team somehow manage a win today. Hmmm - I don't think he'll need to worry too much about making THAT withdrawal from the bank!! (Charles has just told me that today's game is worth £5million. He just knows these things!) On another note, my sister has just sent me a photo from the Land Rover Show that they are attending in Harrogate this morning, of an amazing LR conversion - into a mobile coffee shop. It just happens to be for sale at £16,000. '03 Land Rover and state of the art coffee machine and chillers etc. Very tempting, except none of us can put our hand on that sort of money at the moment. Still in a state of limbo regarding Christina. She stayed away yesterday and overnight, although we know where she is and are receiving regular reports about her condition. I think we are both totally rung out emotionally to be honest. The thing is, watching her reach rock bottom is agonizing and frustrating when we know that for the past year she has had a team around her which was supposed to be working with her to overcome her issues and to manage her condition. Now she is disputing her diagnosis and is beginning to show all the symptoms that were so evident before she was hospitalised and I'm afraid that she may get to a point from which she will be unable to retain control.

BAD START TO THE MORNING

Christina was up at the crack of dawn, opening and closing drawers and cupboards and packing her bags. She left the house at 7.30 saying that she needs space. Sadly, she is in no mental state to cope on her own right now. She might THINK she's okay, but her mental well-being has deteriorated significantly recently and I'm concerned about how she is going to present in public today. We're beside ourselves with worry, but ultimately things have got to take their course I'm afraid.

JUST HAD...

... a horrendous evening with Christina. Had to call the crisis team to get her calmed down and even so it took the best part of 45 minutes before she stopped ranting. Charles and I are both feeling tense, stressed and helpless right now. Neither of us can see ANY benefit from all the counselling she's been having. Tonight we could just have turned the clock back 18 months. Full of fear and trepidation for the future. Can't see how things are going to significantly improve with the current level of care, especially as she is now demanding a second opinion because she disputes her diagnosis of Bipolar 1. So tired of this.

BEEN OUT AND ABOUT TODAY!!

OBVIOUSLY THERE WAS THE USUAL FRIDAY DRIVE TO JESMOND, PLUS A LITTLE DETOUR INTO THE RVI EYE DEPARTMENT FOR AN APPOINTMENT THAT NORMALLY TAKES UPWARDS OF 2 HOURS AND FOR WHICH WE WENT PREPARED WITH MAGAZINES, KINDLES,COSTA COFFEE TO GO, TOOTHBRUSHES AND SLEEPING BAG JUST IN CASE... ... ONLY JOKING ABOUT THE LAST BIT... ... oops have just looked at the screen and noticed I had caps lock on... oh well... ... Only to be done and dispatched within 30 minutes!! Is this a record for anyone in any department of the RVI? Seriously we were impressed!! So, we got home far sooner than expected and then decided to take a little drive to Rothbury for Charles's prescription VIA ALNWICK!! WITH THE GIRLS! I'd forgotten how twisty that road is across to Rothbury and I don't think the girls were over-impressed either. They're great on motorway journey, but all over the place when it's twisty. Mind you, I had also forgotten how exquisitely beautiful that drive is, and on a glorious day like today, it was especially so. Got to Rothbury - the Town that Time Forgot - and that everyone else forgot I expect thanks to the closure of the main road due to that landslide. Looked around a bit (Not that much) then went for coffee and scones. This bit was rally nice as it was warm enough to sit outside and we had the girls with us too, so we enjoyed that. Talking about being warm enough to sit outside, I realised earlier today that in less than six weeks it will be the longest day of the year... ...Just saying...

ON THE DAY THAT DAVID BECKHAM RETIRES...

... it has just occurred to me that it is in fact HIS fault that I ended up with more than a passing interest (get it?) in football. That England/Greece game was the first match I'd been to and although the game itself wasn't up to much in the first half, David Beckham did the job of 11 men on that pitch and I was completely won over - even before he scored THAT goal! So it's his fault that I can barely breathe when NUFC are playing and will undoubtedly suffer an early demise due to having the misfortune of living in an area whee there really is only one club to support. Must be nice to support a team that wins stuff - like my brother does!! He supports Man Utd and like all Man Utd fans, has never lived there and probably has never even been there. But there you go. Must be great not to feel sick when your team is playing. I do every time. It's worse when we're on telly for some reason. I would have thought it would be worse when we're at the ground, but it's not, unless we're 0-4 deon to Arsenal at half time... ... Oh God, talking of Arsenal, who are we playing on Sunday...?

SORE FEET!!

To be honest, I've been on them all day and have only just sat down. It's been one of those days when I haven't paused for breath, have done far too much and don't feel as if I've done any of it particularly well. I've managed to get ready for Centurion tomorrow, I've done an emergency delivery to Radcliffes because they forgot to order yesterday and I'm stupid enough to do it for them, I've been shopping, been to the bank, been to get stuff for a birthday cake I'm doing this week, decorated said birthday cake, hated it so ended up with something I hadn't intended and am disappointed with myself, cooked a roast dinner for eight this evening, had a quick wedding cake consultation with Rachel and James, did a bit more work on the cake and actually like it a bit more now... ... and then I had to listen to Charles telling Claire that it's all MY fault that he's overweight! Okay, I'm stopping cooking. Get your own meals. I suspect you'll find it's all the between meal snacking that's contributing to the weight gain.

NO BLOG...

... NO TIME!!

WHAT A DIFFERENCE IT MAKES...

... when a) Newcastle are safe and b) other teams that are playing have no potential impact on us at all!!! We watched Crystal Palace v Brighton last night and felt no stress whatsoever and really enjoyed it. Tonight we can look forward to Arsenal v Wigan. Honestly don't really care about the result any more but will enjoy the match anyway! Doesn't look like Pardieu will be going anywhere after all and I'm sure I've just caught a fleeting glimpse of a headline that looks as if he considers avoiding relegation to be something of an achievement. Ha ha ha - what a total idiot.

MIGRAINE!! AAARRRGH!!

Just as I turned into Clayton Road the aura started and I just managed to unload the delivery before I was completely felled. Fortunately one of the customers was able to go and get some migraleve and within an hour I was able to drive home safely, but feel really washed out now, so am going to have a lie down to sleep it off properly...

PARDEW LOSES THE PLOT COMPLETELY

Has the guy had some sort of breakdown? Coming out and stating that he doesn't care if we et hammered 4-0 by Arsenal next week? Have you ever heard such negativity from a manager? You should be ashamed Pardew.

STILL GETTING MY BREATHING...

... regulated again!! Might even be able to sleep properly for the first time in nights and not wake up in a cold sweat thinking about life in the championship. Time for Pardew to go though. Sadly I don't imagine NUFC will have anyone of quality lined up but who knows? At least we can go to the last match with all the pressure off.

CAN'T RELAX!!

This is absolute sheer agony! We haven't even kicked off yet but I'm a jibbering heap. In fact I'm in such a state Christina and I are going to go out when the match starts and will not return until after the final whistle. That way a) I don't jinx it and b) my blood pressure stands a chance of remaining fairly steady. If we can't win against QPR we don't deserve to be in this league. But the thought of having to wait until the home game next week for it to be decided is too much to bear.

EMOTIONAL MORNING!!

Had a long chat with Christina about all sorts of stuff that's on her mind. Wouldn't dream of going into detail, but it was difficult to listen to, even though she stayed calm and listened to my contributions. We both ended up feeling that we'd made really good progress though, so celebrated by paying a quick visit to 'Curiously Wicked' and treating ourselves to coffee and scones, followed by a bit of shopping. This afternoon has been spent getting ready for the delivery on Monday and kind of watching the Villa/Chelsea match. The way things are now set up means that if we manage a win tomorrow, we will be safe. Hmmm... ...we'll see.

PARDEW UNSURE ABOUT HIS FUTURE WITH NUFC!

Really? That's surprising. But who on earth would come here to do the job? I can visualise a summer where either we are desperately trying to find a replacement and then have no time to attract new players or we appoint someone with no credibility whatsoever and no new players will want to come AND those that we've got will want to be off. Not at all relaxed about the match on Sunday either. never easy supporting Newcastle, is it?

JUST HOW LONG...

... is this Alex Ferguson love-in going to go on?? Two solid days so far and showing no sign of abating yet. Yawwwwn! Fortunately I've been able to avoid most of it because I've been in the kitchen since 8am and have only just emerged. I think I can remember today's tally: Coffee and walnut cake Carrot cake Caramel shortcake Flapjack Shortbread Brownies Bakewell tarts Apple and sultana cake Chocolate cake Malteser slice AND I've finished a 21st birthday cake as well, so I think I've earned a bit of a rest this evening!!

DIDN'T HAVE TIME...

... to post much on the blog yesterday. Won't have today either!! Not going to feel guilty about that. Will write when I have the time.

HAS DAVID MOYES...

... been appointed then? Listening to SSN it certainly sounds that way. Wonder what Man Utd fans would think of that?

MIGHT SLEEP...

... more easily tonight following that result. Couldn't actually bear to watch, although I kept myself appraised of the situation on Twitter. Well done Swansea!!! Now we need a win at the weekend and then we might be able to breathe a little more easily.

DIDN'T SLEEP WELL LAST NIGHT.

All I could think of was Roberto Martinez's smiling face and how I'm pretty sure that is what we will be seeing at then end of tonight's game meaning we will be in the relegation places. that certainly stopped me sleeping. Supporting NUFC is SERIOUSLY bad for the health.

BANK HOLIDAY MONDAY!

Never really enjoy Bank Holidays. No point going anywhere because everyone else in the world is on the road. Don't want to work because it's supposed to be a holiday, but DO want to work so that I'm not chasing my tail trying to cram three days of baking into two. Just seems like a bit of a waste of a day really. Had a great time last night though. Valley Junction served up the most fab food - as usual and the party at As You Like It was great in that we got to meet James Redpath's family well ahead of their Christmas wedding.

WOKE UP FEELING SICK...

... and then realised it was because I can't get Newcastle's predicament out of my head. This cannot be healthy. Also, what's happened to the sunshine? It was glorious first thing and now its completely clouded over. Shame - we were going to take the girls into Morpeth and have al fresco coffee. Oh well - it's Bank Holiday weekend. Maybe it was to much to ask.

REALLY CANNOT BEAR...

... the stress of the football right now. Other clubs around us are picking up points and we're standing still. It's usually after a win that my brother-in-law decides to ring up to gloat. He's a Villa fan so hasn't been able to do that much this season but I would put money on him doing it tonight. I have to point out that Charles has NEVER done the same to him, but he just loves to wind people up, regardless of how they might actually be feeling. I think even Charles's natural optimism is fading now. I have been saying for weeks that we would be in this position and hey ho here we are with no real hope of getting a win. I haven't heard a single NUFC fan say that they think we'll stay up. Very poor, very disappointing and very sad.

BACK FROM TOWN...

... BEARING MANY BAGS!! Just one pair of shoes though! (The second pair has had to be ordered and will be delivered later this week.) Bought some new baking trays from Lakeland. Not exciting for most people I know, but for me it's a real treat!! Also needed to get a birthday present for James Redpath ready for tomorrow's party. Had breakfast in the Garden Kitchen and wandered around in the sunshine later on with a mango smoothie. A very pleasant morning. Thank you James! xx

GOOD MORNING!!

Off out with James now. Back later.

DELIVERIES DONE...

... baking finished, at least until the order of 20 dozen eggs arrives! Enjoying a cappuccino before going into Morpeth for shopping and a hairdo! And tomorrow, I'm meeting James at his house and then we're going into town, having breakfast and doing some shopping. Looking forward to it. Then on Sunday, it's a quiet day until the evening when it's family dinner at Valley Junction followed by Warpath Redpath's 30th birthday bash at As You Like It!! Radcliffes is closed on Monday so don't need to be doing any serious prep over the weekend. Good few days ahead of us I think!!

ROSE AND CHRISTINA

LOVELY GIRLS!!

BUT AT TEATIME...

... she (Rose!) ate everything in her bowl, in fact she really hoovered it up! So no more worries about her, I'm pleased to say!

MEANT TO PUBLISH...

... that last post four hours ago. Must have got distracted!!

UH OH!!

Rose has just refused to eat her breakfast! This would not be anything to remark on if it had been Lily, but for Rose to refuse food is almost unheard of, so I think we need to keep a close eye on her today. She seems fine in all other ways, but being the little gannet that she is, it is rather disconcerting. Charles and I will be going off to Centurion later on. Apparently they are thrilled with the cakes we supply and consider them 'the best in Newcastle' which is really nice to know. After that. it's a few jobs around Jesmond and Gosforth, then back home to make up an order for Kevin. Hopefully there's be a big delivery of all my dry goods today as I'm running pretty low on flours and sugar.

ANYONE FANCY...

... joining us for a rather nice lasagne this evening? Hannah's coming round and as usual I've made far too much, PLUS Christina has just rung to let me know she may not be in for dinner tonight, so the offer is there - Lasagne, garlic bread. salad and coleslaw, followed by fresh summer fruits and creme brulee with a cheeky little Queen of Puddings on the side. And don't say "freeze it" cos there's no room in the freezer!!