ADRIANO'S...

... it is then!

DON'T THINK...

... it's really a BBQ day. Might have to have a bit of a rethink about lunch because I don't think Jesmond Dene House is a good plan. It's blowing a gale outside. Mind you, that's up here - it could be warm, balmy sunshine in Jesmond for all I know. Better start ringing round to find out what it's like!

HAD A REALLY NICE MORNING!

Picked James up, went to see his friend at the garden centre in Rowlands Gill - he owns it and promised us 40% discount off anything!! That includes some amazing freestanding kitchen furniture that would look amazing in the... ...oh just realised, we still haven't got a new place to put it in. Rats!! Hope he'll still have it when we do eventually find a buyer!! After that we went to a couple of garages to check out Freelanders - just as a bit of research of course. Back home via Morpeth for the big supermarket shop, having thrown James out in Gosforth where he was meeting up with mates in Adrianos. Have just about managed to put together an order for Kevin, although he has got to realise that stocks are now perilously low and won't be replaced until I get the all clear, hopefully a week on Monday. James is coming here shortly and I think the plan is to drive over to Amble for fish and chips, although that may have changed if he stuffed himself at lunchtime!! I could ask Charles to do a BBQ - I've got enough stuff - but I think we're planning to go to Jesmond Dene House for their Sunday lunchtime BBQ tomorrow with Helen and Bill, so we might not want one today as well.

OFF TO MEET JAMES!

Going through to Gosforth this morning to spend a few hours with James as Claire is away on a hen weekend. I think we're going to Rowlands Gill and to a land rover dealer! Back later!!

ENCHILADAS!

That's what we're having for tea - and Charles is cooking!! Can't remember the last time that happened, but really looking for ward to it! In fact I'm starving. Hopefully won't need to have it cut up either.

BIT FED UP TODAY

Combination of miserable weather, frustration with my hand and the limitations it imposes and just generally out of sorts really. I hate not having things to do and actually there is loads I could be doing and would like to be getting on with and that makes it worse really, because I have never been able to leave things till later. If it needs doing it needs to be done NOW - and right now I CAN'T. Grrrrrr!!

THOUGHT I WAS DOING REALLY WELL UNTIL...

... I tried to eat my evening meal and realised that I needed someone else to cut it into bite size pieces for me. Didn't like that one bit.

WHY AM I...

... so tired? I keep trying to read my Kindle and end up falling asleep. This isn't normal! Actually, it's not normal to be reading during the afternoon, so maybe it's a reaction to this enforced relaxation. I've taken the sling off for a while - it was beginning to really irritate me. Still felling sore, but actually not as bad as earlier.

SLEPT OKAY REALLY!

Probably thanks to strong dose of painkillers. I have to say my and is very sore this morning, but I can move my fingers freely and there's no sign of swelling. I hadn't realised how incapacitating it would be to effectively have one operational hand though! I'm beginning to substitute teeth and knees for my right hand whenever I need to create tension! TYyping takes forever, so am going to give up now!

VERY...

...SORE!!

BACK HOME ALREADY!

Having to type with my left hand though! VERY IMPRESSED WITH THE RVI TODAY! So efficient, quick, pleasant and pretty much painless. Got there at 8am, was taken to the ward straight away, checks done, chat with surgeon and into theatre by 8 50. I was first on the list. This never happens to me usually so I must buy a lottery ticket as this could just be my lucky week! Straightforward procedure, although I'm going to find the bulky dressing and sling a bit of a pain. Won't be baking for about ten days when the dressing should come off and stitches will be taken out. Good job it's Wimbledon!!

SETTING OFF...

... for the RVI in five minutes. Just want to get this over with. Back later!!

OKAY, HERE IT IS!

SPIDERMAN CAKE...

... FINISHED. I keep thinking of things I could add to it, but sometimes simple is more effective isn't it? I'll post some photos later, but need to rush into Morpeth to do some shopping now.

DATE FOR SURGERY!!!

WOW. CAN'T BELIEVE THIS. I only had (gleeful) confirmation that I do indeed have carpal tunnel syndrome on Friday and I'm booked in for surgery THIS Wednesday. I know they said it was marked as urgent but that seems remarkably quick to me. Having bit of a panic now because I'm not nearly as organised as I would like to be!!

CHARLES IS STILL IN BED...

... and Lily and Rose are snuggled up with him, so it's very quiet around the house at the moment. Christina is up, dressed and has walked down to the shop for the papers. I've cleaned, ironed and made a tarte au citron and am currently enjoying my first coffee of the day.

BEEN AWAKE SINCE 5.00

Actually, before that now I come to think of it. I was up at 1.30 with the girls, then it must have been about 4.00 when I got up to get 4 dozen scones out of the freezer, then couldn't really get back to sleep and finally gave up completely at about 6.00. Saturday lie in? Obviously not for me!! Actually, my hand has been really painful, so that may have been part of the reason for the sleeplessness. Also, for some reason, I've been making sugarpaste peonies in the little bit of sleep that I have had!! Not sure what we're doing today apart from a delivery to Applebys first thing - oh and Charles needs to get two new tyres as he's got a very flat tyre on the Mercedes. It's lovely and sunny at the moment but it's not supposed to last, so it'll probably be another day spent in the kitchen for me. Great!

GUESS WHAT!!

I've got carpal tunnel syndrome - advanced in my right hand and moderate in the left. I KNOW I HAVE. We knew this weeks ago. Apparently I'm marked down as 'urgent'!!! I've to ring up on Monday and should be given an appointment for surgery within a couple of weeks. Bout time too!!

WE'RE GOING TO ...

... pick Christina up from the station in a little while. Hopefully it won't be as stressful as when Charles picked her up on his own last week. Got an Indian ordered to pick up from Morpeth on the way back. Yum yum!!

NOTHING TO REPORT TODAY!!

Nothing happening apart from the usual stuff. Worried about Christina who is in Cumbria for the day, but has sent a series of texts that have made me think she's not happy or focused on what she's supposed to be doing. Still feeling sick about the mess at Newcastle, but really don't feel inclined to blog about anything much to be honest. Trying to catch up with a baking backlog, so getting hot and bothered in the kitchen. Early appointment at the RVI in the morning to find out what's going on with my right hand. Is it or isn't it carpal tunnel syndrome? Hair appointment later on in the morning as well, so hope I don't have to hang around for too long at the RVI.

ANOTHER DAY...

... another morning waiting for the cooker repair man to turn up for our 'first call'. Beginning to think that it may have been simpler and more cost-effective to just buy a new one! According to Appliances Online I could have a new Leisure 100cm Electric Ceramic Range Cooker in Black delivered tomorrow!! Considering the amount I'll have spent by the time the element is replaced today, I would have nearly been halfway to a new one!

YOU KNOW THE PREVIOUS POST...

... said, "All Done!" ? Well I have to report that that is actually not the case at all. I may have had a temporary return to fan-oven baking, but today it all packed up again, right in the middle of making four large quiche. This time the burning smell would indicate that the element has gone. Admittedly White and McCarthy fell over themselves to try to sort it out and will see us 'first call' in the morning, but I am pretty sick of it all now. Not only is it costing me money, but it's losing me money as well. Not impressed.

ALL DONE!

Obviously it hasn't taken until now to get up and running with the cooker and washer, but we were fully functioning by about 11am and I've been busy since then making up for lost time. Had a quick trip to Morpeth for supplies, and it was like visiting a ghost town. Where was everyone? It was spookily quiet, the was no traffic through town, no problem finding a parking space at all, no queues in shops. Very strange. Right just waiting for the biscotti to come out of the oven, then I'll put the lardy cakes in and take the girls out for a stroll.

FIRST CALL...

... means 10am!!

OKAY, SO WHAT DOES 'FIRST CALL' ACTUALLY MEAN?

That's what we're supposed to be. First call for the cooker and washer repairs. I had thought that would mean anytime from 8.30 on - but we're still waiting for someone to show up at 9.30. Not impressed at all.

SO IT WASN'T A BAD DREAM THEN!

Still no word from NUFC, but it looks like Joke In Here is indeed back as our Director of Football. I can really see this working with Alan Pardew!! Shades of Keegan and Dennis Wise. This club really is unbelievable. If there's any possibility of acting in an incomprehensible, unpopular, nonsensical way they will find it.

FEELING REALLY MISERABLE

I think it's probably because it's Fathers Day - and I still miss him, but I always seem to be on the verge of tears these days, not just today but every day. I can summon up a flood for no reason whatsoever. I'm not liking this at all because I feel as if I'm not really in control of my emotional well-being right now. There is so much stress and uncertainty going on in our lives and I honestly think I'm struggling to deal with it all. The fact that there is no solution to it and the knowledge that this is going to go on for the rest of our lives make it even more daunting. I'm tired of it. I can't do anything to put it right.

FATHER'S DAY

Really miss you Dad. Miss our chats. Miss your laugh. Could do with both of those right now. xxx

DIDN'T WIN!

Oh Poop!

DIDN'T WIN THE EUROMILLIONS...

... so really hope we win the lottery tonight. First time in ages that I've bought tickets, so fingers crossed. I think a lottery win is the only way we are going to get our much longed-for move to Gosforth. I just can't wait for it to happen. We seem to be putting so much on hold until we move. And yet the really sad fact is - no one seems to want to move to Fram. There are so many propertiesin the village on the market. Why is anyone going to choose ours? So fed up.

MORNING!

Just struggled to handwash the laundry and get the whole soggy mass outside to dry off. My hands aren't strong enough any more to really wring them out, so they have to drip outside for a while before going into the tumble drier. I know you're not interested but this is my life at the moment and, in the grand scheme of things, handwashing the laundry isn't too bad. Walking on the eggshells of Christina's illness however is more debilitating than you could ever imagine.

AND JUST TO TOP...

... everything off, the washing machine has now packed up. And to make matters worse, its full of cleaning clothes that I used when I managed to spill a full carton of cream all over the floor. It's half-heartedly filled itself, but done nothing else apart from click occasionally, so we now have a washed full of cream-coated cloths that are going to smell horrendous by the time we work out how to get them out. I am absolutely fed up now.

DID I SAY...

... that Christina was doing really well? Forget that. We've just had a hugely stressful evening and I suspect it's not over yet. So disappointed, sad and angry.

SO WHAT I WANT TO KNOW IS...

...Do I pay a call out for today's visit in which the engineer told me what was wrong with the cooker ie the clock has packed up and the oven won't work because of this? The only reason I ask is because I TOLD them on Tuesday that the clock had packed up and the oven won't work because of this. I also gave them the model number. So why did he need to come out and tell me what I already know?? Why have I now got to wait until sometime next week before I'm going to be up and running again? So cross and fed up.

I'M ANTICIPATING...

... a rather frustrating day today. The cooker repair man is due 'sometime this morning' and, until he has done his job, I can't get anything done in the kitchen at all. Once he's gone, however, I'll need to work like crazy to get orders ready for Centurion and Radcliffes to go out tomorrow. In the meantime, I'm just twiddling my thumbs, which isn't something I'm particularly good at!

BIT DULL AND MISERABLE TODAY!!

Normally wouldn't mind too much if I had a full day in the kitchen - but, having just attempted a batch of scones in the back up oven, I'm just not going to risk any major baking today. Hope and pray that the engineer can sort the fan oven out tomorrow or I'm seriously going to struggle to get deliveries out. So, the fact that the weather is pretty gloomy today IS actually a disappointment as I could have enjoyed a day in the sun. Might ring Helen to see how she's doing!!

JUST NEED TO SAY...

... that Christina has been amazing for the last few days; in fact for the best part of a week now. She's back on the meds and it has made a huge difference. All the anger, stress and agitation that we'd been going through in the preceding weeks have subsided and she is lovely, calm, content and communicative. It's incredible to see the effect her meds actually do have on her stability - and how quickly her mood changes if she messes around with the dose. Hopefully, she will be feeling so much better in herself now and will be able to make the connection between this and taking her tablet.

NOTHING MUCH...

... happening today. (Although I'm guessing there's more going on in this house than in Helen's! According to my Mum she's bored already. Oh dear!!) I've done a delivery, been shopping, made a couple of cakes in the 'other' oven (still not convinced) and am now going to settle down on the settee wih the girls and my Kindle. Bliss!!

AND THE BAD NEWS IS...

... that my main cake oven is knackered again. The timer has gone completely, so there's no way the fan oven is going to work without that. Can't get anyone out until Thursday as they need Charles here to help to move it. Might have a very light week in terms of baking. I do have a conentional oven, but it's never been nearly as good as the fan oven so I tend not to use it when I'm making stuff for the coffee shops. Hmmm. What to do?

AND THE GOOD NEWS IS...

... Helen is home, having had a successful operation this morning. Her shoulder is repaired. She's eaten the requisite piece of toast, although wasn't able to spread butter on it and Bill has picked her up and is currently waiting on her "with all the flourish of Edmund Blackadder" apparently. Sadly, I can picture this so clearly.

JUST SHORT OF A YEAR AGO...

... my sister fell through the bathroom ceiling while helping with the renovation work at Rachel and James's terraced house in Gosforth. Literally, fell through it. Landed badly, shaken up obviously, very bruised and left with a damaged shoulder. Today, she's going in for the surgery on her shoulder that is hopefully going to give her pain-free movement. Good luck today Helen. Hope it goes well and will talk to you later.

HAVE REALLY ENJOYED...

... today. Much less busy than yesterday, but just as nice. We had a leisurely breakfast with Mum, then met Helen and Bill at Heighley Gate where we somehow managed to spend three hours just pootling about. Mum happily examined every single product on display while the four of us went into a rapturous dreamworld when looked round the showhouse/cabin thing that they have on display there and discussed the possibility of buying our own plot miles from anyone, having one of those little properties each, joined by a covered walkway, growing our own vegetables... Oh it could be bliss. Sadly we had to leave the dream and we returned home to be joined by 'Dice' and his wife Jude who called in on their way from Berwick back to Rotherham. After that we had a lovely chicken salad outside in the sun with Christina, who has had a much happier and calmer few days - and as a result, so have we!!

WE HAVE HAD...

... such a lovely day. The weather has been perfect, the company brilliant, the BBQ food was amazing - well done Charles, and the whole day has just been delightful. We need to return the glassware in the morning and take a quick trip to the tip with the rubbish, but apart from that have nothing really planned, other than taking Mum to Gosforth so she can return to Yorkshire with Helen and Bill. Now, everyone here seems to be turning in for the night. Obviously all that sun, food and a bit of drink has taken it out of us!!

UP EARLY!!

Lots to do before 3pm!! Fortunately Charles and Christina are also up and busy helping - and clearly they are doing such a good job that I have actually got time to have a cuppa and to write a bit of blog! First to arrive should be Helen, with my Mum. Then Hannah, James and Claire if all goes according to plan. After that, it'll be a free for all around mid-afternoon. My big worry is, naturally, the girls. I just hope they cope with the crowd, the high spirits and the possibility that the gate may not be secured at times! Knowing Lily, she'd be off in a flash. Rose, on the other hand, would want to hang around to be with people and to see what's going on!!

LIONHEART!!

It's that time again. The radio is on, tuned into Lionheart!! Hope it's a good, summery show today. Have just heard the forecast and it sounds as if it's going to be a good day again tomorrow. This is highly surprising as it's the day of our BBQ and I wouldn't be at all surprised if a rogue cloud doesn't burst over our village during the course of the afternoon as that seems to be our usual lot. (The Radio Presenter is just leaving for the show!!) Byeeeeeeeeeeeee! Hope everyone turns up tomorrow as we have enough food to feed a small country. Might have to find some waifs and strays on the streets and drag them in to help us finish it off!!

CAN'T ACTUALLY BELIEVE...

... that it was only this morning that I had my hair done. It seems like ages ago!! I HAVE been remarkably busy since I got back mind you, trying to get two deliveries ready for the morning as well as starting on the desserts for the BBQ. I could quite happily cut both of my feet off right now, they are so sore. I know exactly what's going to happen now as well. As soon as I sit down in front of the telly, I'm going to fall asleep. (Rose is flat out on the sofa right now and is snoring for England.) (Had to laugh at Lily this afternoon. Charles spent about 3 hours pressure washing the block paving and Lily stayed by his side all the time getting pretty wet, but not wanting to leave her Dad!!)

NEED TO START GETTING READY...

... for Saturday's BBQ. I'm not altogether sure how we ended up doing this - especially as it's supposed to be a first wedding anniversary celebration!! However - we ARE dong it, so we need to get sorted. Charles has already gone off to do his morning chores. Delivery to Centurion, shopping for BBQ meats and drink, then back home to tidy up the gaden and pressure hose the garden furniture. As for me - I'm shopping for food and 'party' tableware, having hair done (I know, not strictly BBQ related, but it'll save time on the day!) coming home to make huge apple pie (this is going to be such a pain as the current crop of Bramleys resemble marbles more than actual apples and it's going to mean peeling and coring about 20 apples just to make one flaming pie!), start an enormous trifle, make meringues and also find the time to make anything Kevin may need for tomorrow - oh and 36 assorted scones for Applebys that they need tomorrow morning. Also have the ever so slight problem of where we're going to actually store stuff as all the freezers and fridges are pretty full. Hmmm - may have to delay SOME of the shopping till tomorrow then. Okay - I'd better get off...

WELL...

... we are certainly being listened to. There might be no solution to the problem, but everyone we've spoken to this week has taken us seriously and indicated that we are right to be worried and that they are too. This is all so sad, because we were doing so well a few months ago.

WONDER HOW...

... the meeting with the doctor will go this afternoon? I don't hold out any hope in terms of solutions, but just hope that she will listen to us and take our concerns on board. Charles is coming home early for this one as it's so important. Before we go we need to sit down and put together our list of concerns - although to be honest, I don't know where that would begin or end.

NOT SURE...

... that this morning's phonecall from our GP solved anything, BUT he listened, he asked questions, he understood what we're gong through and could relate to our experiences because he knows our family and, more importantly, knows how Christina presents when she is becoming ill. He is going to talk to the mental health team about the fact that we are struggling and need their support. Actually feel better just having spoken to him. Hopefully, we'll come away from tomorrow's meeting with the team feeling even more positive.

ANOTHER GLORIOUS DAY!!

Perfectly blue sky, warm and sunny. Idyllic start to the day. Might nip into Morpeth in a while, but need to be back for my phone appointment with our GP. Tried to make an appointment to actually SEE him in person to discuss the stress we are under these days and was told that the earliest actual appointment would be in JULY!! So we're having to make do with a phone call instead. Here's a thought: If he can talk to me on the phone - how come he couldn't have talked to me in his surgery??

HAS SOMEONE...

... slipped a sleeping tablet in my cuppa today? I can't believe how tired I suddenly am. It's okay when I'm on the go and keeping busy, but the minute I stop and sit down I fall asleep. This is not like me at all and I really don't like it.

POOR HELEN AND BILL!

At 9pm yesterday Hannah discovered a problem with her mini that meant it wasn't going to be driving her up to Newcastle ready for the start of term today. So Helen and Bill had to drive her back, which meant that they wouldn't actually get home and to bed themselves until 2am at the earliest. Bet they're shattered today!

MAY HAVE MADE...

... a little progress. At least we have had something that resembles a conversation with Christina. We've got a vitally important week coming up in terms of her care and assessment. All we want is for her to be happy and healthy, but that seems to be a long way from where she is right now.

AWFUL MORNING!!

Were trying to have a conversation with Christina. It's getting nowhere.

CAN YOU BELIEVE...

... that a whole year has passed since James and Claire got married? I just don't know where the time has gone. It was the most amazing weekend, from the BBQ the night before, through the day of the wedding and ending up with breakfast at JDHH and the party on the Sunday afternoon. A perfect weekend of wedding celebrations! Sadly, of course, Mum fell when she got home resulting in an operation, a heart attack and a long stay in hospital, so that wasn't too good, but she's made a remarkable recovery since then. James and Claire are celebrating the anniversary tomorrow of course, but we're having a BIG BBQ next weekend when lots of the people who were guests last year will be able to get together. Hopefully the weather will be dry, because if it's not I'm not sure what we're going to do!! As for today - Charles and I need to do some gardening, then we're going into Morpeth to meet James for coffee and after that I think I'm baking pretty much all weekend. Hey ho!!